Monday, September 15, 2008

Slippery Slope

Did you all miss me? I missed you!

Mr. Perfectly got his telephoto lens. It keeps getting bigger, so I guess he's happy.

I imagine I'll have lots of close up pictures to show you......

Mom's visit was nice, but too short. They stayed here on Friday night and apparently, things got sort of messy. My mom and stepdad wanted a suite with a hot tub. They decided with their trip here they'd have a 'mini' vay cay and have some time to themselves.

Mom has not had alot of experience with hot tubs. I mean, neither have I, but still.....the proprietor of Cliff Manor left bath salts and bubble bath and instructions how to use them on the side of the tub. She used what she says the instructions indicated, and they were overrun with bubbles. Apparently my mom was carrying them to the shower and sinks by the armload to try to get them out of the tub......I guess by the time she was done, the shower stall was pretty full with suds. My stepdad apparently didn't gauge the heat in the tub and came up after time looking like a lobster. He encouraged mom to get in....that the jets of water would RELAX her.......she managed to get stuck. She couldn't get out of the tub. It was too slick and soapy for her to get a foothold, and she literally was stuck. She was fearful that she'd have to call the manager, the fire department or my husband to hoist her stepdad even went so far as to get his belt and try to pull her out with it. He got into the tub with her and tried to LIFT her out, but to no avail.

Finally, after 40 minutes of panicked floundering, she drained the tub and put a towel down to get her footing and emerged......not relaxed, needless to say. She was laughing about it Saturday, but I supposed when it was happening it was pretty scary. She said she was glad she didn't have to call Mr. Perfectly to rescue her. Nobody is MORE glad about that than Mr. Perfectly.

Mr. Perfectly finds himself in awkward situations sometimes. Like the time he had to help my VERY elderly (but dearly loved) Great Aunt onto and off of the toilet, while my grandma had to handle the 'cleaning up' side of things. Or the time my Mom nearly was stuck in our new water bed. Or the time my mom was visiting me in the hospital after son #1 was born, and she was loudly farting (because she was laughing so hard) onto a large wooden rocking chair. The sound reverberated off the wood and echoed.

These, internet, are the things my poor husband has to endure in my family.

He also gets hurt alot while helping my dad on the farm. He's broken an arm, been bitten by cats (and had to get IV Antibiotics as a result), broken a finger, torn a tendon and other various things........ and he still puts up with us.....

Anyway, we had a birthday party for Maddi, and although I promised, I'm afraid I didn't get many pictures of Mom. I have a couple and will post them.....I have some of me and son #1 that turned out good.......son #2 was sitting away from my grasp, so he managed to escape motherly embraces for photos. Not to worry, I'll get him later.

I realized today that I haven't told you one of my idiosyncrasies. I can't suck on hard candies. I immediately chew them up and annihilate them. I do it with suckers, mints and any hard candies I try to eat. I start with the goal to suck them, but it never works out. I ALWAYS chew them up. What's up with that? It's probably some deep seated psychological thing or something. I'm sure it can be analyzed like my snake dreams.

Well, that's it for now, folks. I know it was RIVETING conversation, but that's all I've got this late on a Monday........I wasn't going to post even, but I thought that some of you may actually want to see what I have to say, so I decided to give you a small peek into the weirdness of my world.

Toodles for now!!


Mr. Perfectly said...


All in all it is still worthwhile.

The chewing thing is hereditary. You come by it honestly. Think about your dad eating a mint.

Kristen said...

I do the same thing with the hard candies. I also chug any drink I might have.

That explains why I drink so damn much...

stoogepie said...

So, you start out talking about how Mr. Perfectly's lens keeps getting bigger and bigger, and you end up talking about how you can't suck but must chew hard candies. And you don't think that can be analyzed? I beg to differ!

That hot tub story is just awesome. I wish you had photos of that!

Perfectly Shelly said...

Mr.--what is still worthwhile. Yeah, I'd forgotten about Perfectly's dad and mints (and gum)

Crissy--Mr. Perfectly accused me the other day of being a wino....because when I drink wine (or other adult drinks), I get sleepy----like the panty waste I that worried me, so I've been trying to curb it.....a tiny bit...but not tonight....tonight will be tropical drink and Big Brother finale night.......Oh, and tomorrow will be pre-football game and drunken Ghost Hunter night! Then I'll have to stop......for a few days.....

Stoogie--I knew I could count on you to get my subtle innuendos!!!

There's more to the hot tub story---not so much more, but maybe more funny detail....I'll elaborate in my next post. It helps if you know mom, too.