Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Tirade Tuesday

Well, nothing like getting up and having Mother Universe KICK YOU IN THE ASS.
I’m trying to be calm, and all parental, but I’m LOSING MY EVER LOVING MIND.

Son #1 ‘spent the night’ with his friend Saturday night…….. but as I found this morning, he actually trekked up to the big college town north of us, and stayed there all night long. In a girl’s room. Believe it or not, the girl’s room is freaking me out 100x less than the sneaking around a LYING. I don’t think he and this girl are involved, but even so, the whole spend the night with a girl thing is way less disturbing to me than LYING.

I’m nearly in tears-----there are times when having teenagers is really hard…….and other times, it is totally all worth it. This is a really hard time. He turns 18 in 2 weeks, and I fear the “I’m 18 and you can’t tell me what to do” syndrome. He truly doesn’t ‘get it’. Of course, he thinks I don’t ‘get it’.

I want to cry, internet. I know this is a ‘this too shall pass’ moment. I totally get that. But in the throes of the panic and worry, it sure as hell doesn’t SEEM LIKE IT. I fear him totally leaving when he’s 18. I fear that he will expect all the ‘good’ stuff from us (cell phones, money, vehicle, etc) and dump on us by using the ‘I’m 18 and you can’t tell me what to do anymore’ thing. My entire being fears this……..boot shaking FEAR.

Ok, and what is with the everyone saying Eva Longoria is ‘just fat’. Do these people really know the definition of fat? Eva Longoria doesn’t even come CLOSE to fitting that description……it’s so humiliating for someone like ME to see someone like HER flippantly saying that “I’m just fat……tee hee”. It’s like a slap in the face to me……because they don’t KNOW fat…….I don’t even watch Desperate Housewives, or keep up with that crew, but the MEDIA is in such a tizzy over whether or not she’s pregnant or not, that it’s a HEADLINE……a freaking HEADLINE when our economy is on the brink of DISASTER, the mainstream media is worried whether or not Eva Longoria is fat or pregnant.

Ok, and to tell THIS story, you need to hear a little background on my cat. He, on occasion, will pee on items left on the floor. Towels, socks, SHORTS…….so for me, being the terrible housekeeper that I am, poses a minor problem at times. Mr. Perfectly doesn’t LIKE it when the cat pees on stuff. Even if it isn’t HIS stuff. But anyway, a good sign that cat has peed somewhere is when he is near the offending item, and ‘scratching’ to ‘cover’ the mess----now he doesn’t have front claws…so he’s really only swiping, not scratching, but you know what I mean…..that sweeping motion a cat uses with their foot to ‘cover’ their business. Of late, he seems to try to cover ALL the smells in the house. Where the dog lays, where we sit, where the food is….it’s kind of weird…we worry that he’s thinking about peeing or something. I am not a cat, so I don’t know what he’s THINKING…….

So, anyway……usually an hour or so before the alarm, cat comes into our room and stalks us and the dogs. He sits and peers through the slats in the blinds for birds and squirrels to stalk. He insists on ‘scratching’ the cardboard we have in our window (because we are classy like that) to cover the area where a window fan fits, but the blinds don’t go all the way down.. We fight him in the early morning hours. Damn nocturnal cat. So this morning, he came and nuzzled me on my face, which is common…..and he began SMELLING me…..my mouth and breath precisely-----and immediately began ‘scratching’ the blanket tucked so very sweetly under my chin…..so apparently the early morning gods were trying to TELL ME SOMETHING………and the cat was trying to cover the god awful smell.

So, as you can see, I’ve had a great start to the day. It’s only 8:10 in the morning. What other lovely things await me today?

Oh, and Mr. Perfectly and I are suffering from Puppy Fever….in a bad way. Tell us that 2 dogs, a cat and 2 teenagers ARE ENOUGH…..we don’t NEED another dog…….(but the ones we found are SO CUTE)…….we need a pet intervention.

Sorry to be a Daisy Downer today---but it just is one of those worrisome days…….Hold me internet….make it all go away.

Friday, September 26, 2008

What were YOU doing 21 years ago?

If you say being born, or if you were a toddler then NEVER MIND.

This is what I WAS DOING 21 yrs ago...

Don't we look about 12? Son #2 and Girlfriend are looking through my wedding album and he professed that it looked like a typical SEVENTIES wedding......ahem....we were married in the EIGHTIES!

This is set to be such an AWESOME weekend........tonight it's dinner out...at a new restaurant in town....Ria's. We've not eaten there before and in our town, a new restaurant is CRAZY to get into......but we will give it a shot.

Tomorrow, of course is FESTIVAL DAY!!N We will be going to OKTOBERFEST.....and Teenie, Jakki will be there, and a SURPRISE!! Ph.D is coming for a surprise visit! I'll meet LESTER for the first time.......I'm so excited!

Then tomorrow night is the car show downtown, in which Mr. Perfectly and Perfectly's dad will be showing the 1967 Camaro. I can't say car shows excite me, but they do the hubs and dad, so it will be fun to see THEM have fun.

I am surprised to know that Ph.D is coming for a visit. All of my very best friends will be around.....I'm getting verclempt!!

Sunday, Teenie and I have tentative plans, so I'm BOOKED...I can't believe it...this NEVER happens............I'm very excited.

Happy Friday, everyone!! Y'all KNOW this is my very favorite day.

Have a great weekend!!!!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008


Who the heck invented parental guilt? I think it was teenagers during pre-historic times that decided parental guilt was FUN. They instilled the guilt into their Neanderthal parents, and the syndrome evolved into a full time event.

Son #2 has a game tonight….in another town. It’s not far, but STILL. He isn’t playing because of the back injury---so I thought I’d stay in with the SURVIVOR premiere. Mr. Perfectly is going, because of course he’s the BETTER parent and takes pictures and doesn’t drink boxed wine very often.

I guess I feel like I should be a GOOD football mommy and go support my injured kid and the team. BUT I REALLY WANT TO STAY HOME. So I’m in a conundrum…….

Mr. Perfectly scanned the back x-rays and is anxious for me to put them out there for you to see. Think of all the spine models and pictures you’ve always seen. Each little vertebra has the bones pinched together down the middle---LIKE PIE DOUGH…….pinched bone, then space, pinched bone, then space……you follow me? Look at the bones above the circle first………..you see pinched vertebra bones, don’t you?

Now, look at this x-ray, and see where Mr. Perfectly has circled.

Uh Huh!! Not pinched!!!!……THAT, my friends, is what spina bifida occulta is. And according to the orthopedist, it is a ‘non-issue’. You could very well have the same condition and not even know it. If you DO find out you have it, talk to your doctor…it probably has no impact on your life whatsoever.

So, to all of my 5 readers, should I go to the game or not? I want to be supportive, but then on the other hand, son #2 is not going to play, so what is the best option?

Happy Thursday. Tommorow is our 21st anniversary. YEAH US! I absolutely could not have married a nicer, better guy than I did. He actually loves me. It still surprises me sometimes. He’s kind, thoughtful, and SMART. Oh, and he’s really hot, too. I, on the other hand, can be stubborn, ornery, needy, impatient and a little ‘princess-ish’. Yet he still hangs in there……..you’ve got to admire a guy willing to deal with me.

Toodles for now!!

An offer you can’t refuse

Well, maybe you CAN REFUSE, but hey…I got your attention, didn’t I?

Since it is festival time around here, I decided that if anyone wants any of the kitchy, crafty stuff that one finds at street festivals like wine bottle cheese boards and ribbon/star garland halos, just let me know, and I’ll go on the hunt for you.

The only issue I see cropping up is that whole ‘trust’ issue thing…..You know, we meet on the internet, and I’m a wanna be funny girl, but am I REALLY? Maybe I’m a gnarly 60 yr old man with nose hair looking for a new hostage…I mean companionship. Maybe I’m your RELATIVE that is stalking you.

Seriously, I’m just a wanna be funny girl---so you’d have to TRUST me with your mailing info and I’d have to trust you with mine (what….you think I’m gonna foot the BILL for all the loot?). You’d have to trust my judgment with your precious $1 for a halo, or $10 for the wine bottle…….because you know, what if I love it and you…not so much?

And, this would have to be under the approval of Mr. Perfectly---he’s the conservative one in this family---By the way, I’m totally SHOCKED that he’s pimpin’ for Stoogie’s sweepstakes! He doesn’t DO stuff like that……hey, go vote for his ‘best sports blog’. He nominated himself (another shocker).


I must confess, I want Photoshop for my hubby---he has the free photo software but having the ‘real’ photoshop is his dream. I personally want MELISSA LION’S books! I have this secret fantasy of being all literary and bookish---of wearing peasant skirts and flowy tops in a coffee bar hearing really cool poetry (and ‘getting’ it)……having pale, emaciated authors as my friends---we could stay up drinking coffee and sharing our literary knowledge……..so to have signed copies of a real authors books totally makes me HOT----I mean, I’d highly look forward to receiving them!

I’ve been trying to think of a fun, catchy, creative way to pimp Stoogie’s sweepstakes, but I just can’t find the mojo……..Creativity doesn’t run like a river through my veins……….

Okay, so now I’ve accomplished a few things on my ‘to do’ list…..offer my festival services for your desire of crafty stuff, and to pimp Stoogie’s sweepstakes.


Tuesday, September 23, 2008


I admire people who are able to take one topic per day and blog about it. It seems like this would give one a nearly UNLIMITED supply of blogs---but I seem totally unable to do that. I blog about EVERY little thing that rumbles through my brain as I’m composing a post. THEN, I get freaked out that I FORGOT some little comment or tidbit that would make my musings funnier, or more insightful, or even more stupid!

I don’t know what the rules of blogging are. Therefore, my own rules go! I’ll blog about whatever I want, and ramble on as long as I want, and if you don’t like it, then read it anyway---and COMMENT……..only be nice. I’m scared of hateful comments.

There are SO many things to share----There is no rhyme or reason to the order in which my musings are noted…….

Son #2’s spina bifida is a ‘non-issue’ to quote the Orthopedist that saw him yesterday. Props to the doctors here and at Columbia Orthopaedic Group that were generous enough to get this situation worked out SPEEDILY……I mean c’mon……A family doctor visit which diagnosed the spina bifida (SB) Friday morning, an MRI an hour later, and RESULTS from the MRI in my hands by 4pm Friday afternoon, and then a SPECIALIST appointment by Monday at 10:30. Wow. I was able to take x-rays and a CD of his MRI with me to the appointment on Monday, so the doctor had all the info right in front of him. Athletes in Mid Mo are ‘taken care of’ so to speak. The doctors know how coaches are and so forth, but this is a Freshman player---not a college level player….therefore I am truly grateful that everyone was so accommodating to us. As it turnes out, son #1 is cleared to play any and all sports he wants to. This SB is a non-issue in his life, and he is not at any greater risk than anyone else of his activity level of back injury…….Son #2 was very happy about that. He was NOT so happy to hear that his lumbar injury that he got Thurs. night (that caused the doctor visit that found the SB) would keep him out of the game until NEXT Monday. I keep reminding him that a week off is way better than a lifetime off, but to a 15 yr old, a week is a lifetime. Although, I must say, he’s been very good about all of this. He is understanding that he’s lucky----but I know he’s still frustrated to not be able to jump right back in. He’ll miss a game on Thursday…….but he’ll be back for their toughest opponent the following week.

I have x-rays that Mr. Perfectly will try to scan and I’ll illustrate what the deal is…..it’s kind of interesting…especially knowing it does not affect his life or well being in any way. But I forgot to bring them home last night, and I don’t have those yet. Watch later tonight or tomorrow for x-ray shots…..if they scan okay, that is.

McDonalds new “Mocha’s” are NASTY. Nasty. I am all for the flavored powdered stuff that gas station machines spew out….and then call coffee (or cappuccino)…..I think they taste good! But I couldn’t even finish this stuff. It had some weird aftertaste……or during taste……I don’t know, it was just awful.

Perfectly’s dad has been having his 1967 Chevy Camaro restored. He bought it new in 1967. I drove it as a teenager (and was mortified to drive an ‘old’ car). It’s a three speed (on the ‘tree’) and it’s turquoise in color. He had it ‘restored’ once before, but wasn’t real pleased with the results, and it has been being ‘restored’ again for the last 2 years. They guy doing it is METICULOUS and has taken a lot of time and care in this restoration. Mr. Perfectly and Perfectly’s dad are going to try to hang out with the car at the city’s last downtown car show of the year. They have one at the end of each month during the summer………and I think they are both excited at the idea. Mr. Perfectly is a car fanatic……..Son #1 wants to ‘borrow’ the newly restored car for Homecoming. Ha. I doubt that will happen. I’m anxious to see how it all goes.

Stoogie wanted to see a picture of my ‘slumped’ bottle to use as a cheese board. So, for your viewing pleasure, here’s a photo…..oh, and one of the tiara I bought……

I wish I could make these….it is such a cool idea…….I could give them as work presents at Christmas! A packaged cheese ball mix, a cheese spreader, and the board, and VIOLA!!!---instant gift. In the picture, it looks like the bottle may not be very flat, but it is......as flat as it CAN BE..... the round part of the bottom of the bottle does stick up A LITTLE, but not as much as the photo depicts. IT's really a cute, albeit kitchy idea!

That’s all I’ve got for now. I seriously thought I had a lot more stuff to talk about, but I guess my advanced age is preventing me from remembering…….I’m sure as soon as I hit ‘publish’, I’ll remember them, and be annoyed at myself.

Toodles for now!

Sunday, September 21, 2008

The California, MO Ham and Turkey festival

Yep, you read that correctly---a festival devoted to the Ham and Turkey production in California, MO. Burger's smokehouse, and Cargill turkey production is highlighted in this homey, Ozark festival. If you all need gifts to ship or something 'different' for those of you not living in Missouri, contact Burgers, and get a catalog....they have really good meat products.....seriously.

Mr. Perfectly and I trekked the 20 miles to this festival. We were looking forward to smoked turkey legs (they are huge) and freshly squeezed lemonade, homemade potato chips, and homemade apple butter.

The festival must be lacking vendors this year, because we weren't sure if they had the homemade potato chips, or turkey legs (we didn't see them), and the DID NOT have my homemade apple butter. NO APPLE BUTTER...that's the only reason I WENT!!

I did, however, buy 2 princess tiara's (one for me and one for Teenie), and a melted bottle to use as a cheese tray. I'm now obsessed. Hey, I drink wine---and sometimes from a bottle (as opposed to a box)...so I want to make flattened, melted bottles to use for crackers and cheese. The problem is that I don't have a kiln. Anyone out there have a spare kiln I could use for a couple of months? And the Cliffs Notes version of how to operate it?

Anyway, our festival adventure was mildly disappointing......we did get freshly squeezed lemonade and limeade, which was.....meh...just okay......and Mr. Perfectly got a corndog (I DETEST corndogs.....blech), and we got a ham sandwich---from the Burgers Smokehouse tent. It was actually quite good despite the fact when I opened it up, I saw a nearly soggy hamburger bun with a couple of slabs of ham thrown on it. I was worried, Internet about the $4.00 I'd spent for it....but it ended up being quite good........

Here are some festival photos. It looks like there were thousands of people in attendance...I know...but really it wasn't very crowded.......I think it's the long couple of blocks long camera angle..........Ummm...yeah, the 'camera angle' is also responsible for my ample backside...yea!! That's it!!!

Here's some of the 'entertainment' on the South Flat Bed Truck......I mean STAGE....oops STAGE is what I meant......

We called son #1 so he could come and get his tattoo finished, but alas, he was working.....he should have come...what a DEAL!!

Here is the washer competition. I am not sure what washers is....a game akin to horseshoes, I assume. People were nuts about it, though!!

Here is the hand thrown pottery! I ADORE hand thrown pottery. I also have realized I can't afford hand thrown pottery!! Even in rural MO. The covered dish I'm looking at was $40...so until I get that kiln, I'm stuck admiring it.

Mr. Perfectly and I were SO SURPRISED at the people that showed up to this small town festival!!

Oh Crissy? Awesome Networking!!

Stoogie, Mr. Perfectly wants to make 'sure' he wins that prize package........he wants the Photoshop most rabidly!! What does one need to do to assure a win? I mean 'randomly' of course.............how do we assure his 'random' winning of the prizes?

Toodles for now!!

Friday, September 19, 2008

And the award for bringing Perfectly's spirits up is........

DINGO!! Woot Woot!!

Dingo, you made me laugh out loud, and I've had a STRESSFUL day, therefore the laughter is most welcome. I see that you DO pay attention to my little ramblings. How I wish you were HERE to have some of those $1.50 margaritas with me tonight! Actually, I think they are $3.95 on 'non' margarita nights........still, not to bad.

OK, First and foremost my baby got hurt playing football last night. I (luckily) didn't see him NOT GET UP AFTER BEING TACKLED (otherwise, a sweaty fat mama would have been on the field with the sweaty, fit football players). He apparently got up and I saw him limp off of the field. Now, bless his heart, Son #2 has been known to over play his conditions.......but this is FOOTBALL....and boys don't fake it, you know? So, I assumed he had a leg/knee/ankle injury of some sort. The doctor on the field began messing with his BACK----his BACK people!! They pulled his helmet off (another sign of doom) and I saw shaking of heads (translated as 'you are out for the night) and some pissed off boy walking, etc. The doctor came back and affixed an ice pack to his back (lower left, for the record). They put what looks like saran wrap around whatever body part is hurt----with the ice under it, and it secures the ice to the body without the player having to hold it (those un-reliable teenagers!!!). This mama was NOT happy.....I missed the rest of the game for keeping my keen mama eyes on my kid for the duration. He limped ALOT (ok....limping means legs, right? not back WTF??)

As it turned out, he HAD injured his back. The Doctor (whom I now know to be an orthopaedist---) said he was bruised, and to keep it iced. He complained of severe pain last night, so we called the family doctor....we ended up giving him 500 mg of Naprosen.......that didn't seem to help....he said he was up alot in the night (awakened, that is). His lower left back was SWOLLEN....how does a skinny back SWELL? So, being the momsey womsey that I am, I made him an appointment to see the doctor. The doctor was surprised at the 'puffiness' of the back area (ok, so I said swollen---it sounds more serious than 'puffy'). They did an x-ray. The injury appeared to be a spasming muscle, for which he got drugs (lucky kid). BUT....now's the REST of the story....

He has a condition called SPINA BIFIDA OCCULTA. Yes, SPINA BIFIDA. This did not make the mama very happy. The doctor prescribed an MRI and NO FOOTBALL (seeing as there is some sort of opening to the freaking spinal cord) until an Orthopaedic dr evaluates the situation. I STRONGLY suggested to the referral clerk that we get an mri TODAY. An an Ortho consult TODAY. And guess what? We got the MRI TODAY...but no ortho consult.

I came home and immediately googled Spina Bifida. That is what the doctor told me son #2 has. I am thinking wheelchairs, neurological deficits, and all the TERRIBLE things we moms are warned about during pregnancy. Apparently, there is more than ONE TYPE of spina biffida, and he has the most minor and most common variety. I found the occulta name ON MY OWN (thanks for the panic, Doc). We miraculously got the mri results by 3pm today (see, living in a small city does have it's perks) Here is the IMPRESSION of the radiologist:

1. Minimal posterior fusion defect at S1, with no MRI evidence of associated complication. Specifically, there is no evidence of a stress fracure in the lumbosacral spine, and no evidence of instability in the lumbar spine.

2. No spinal canal, lateral recess or neural foramina stenosis is present at any level.

What does that mean? I have no earthly idea, but I see minimal defect and no stenosis (which sounds bad)...so I feel better.

THEN I came home to google where in the heck S1 is in the back, and found Dingo's comment, which made me LAUGH OUT LOUD, which I really needed.

I feel loved people. You all LIKE ME, YOU REALLY, REALLY LIKE ME!!

We are still required to get a 'free to play football' pass from an orthopaedist, but from googling spina bifida occulta, it doesn't appear that there's tons of sports related info on it, therefore, we are assuming (ahem, hoping) that maybe this means he'll be able to play as normal---no restrictions. I'll give the doctor who evaluated is non spina bifida injury last night a copy of the findings and we'll see what he thinks. He doesn't take spinal referrals, but he is the football volunteer doctor, and he IS an orthopod, so hopefully he'll at least have some educated insight to all of this.

And I missed work.........which is fine....but on a FRIDAY---my favorite day!!!

So, see people? I need margaritas tonight!! And some nachos. Who's buying?

Thursday, September 18, 2008


I’ve been tagged by Jakki for a meme. I've never gotten tagged before!! When I get emails demanding I forward stuff, I ignore it….I don’t care if I won’t have the angels watching over me. I don’t buy into urban legends. But the meme has intrigued me. Therefore, I shall do it, and tag 6 others…….. YOU ALL BETTER COME THRU….because you know how I crave love and acceptance!!

6 UNSPECTACULAR things about me:

1) I adore television
2) I am easily frustrated, irritated and often anxious
3) I over analyze almost everything
4) I love dogs—especially Chihuahuas and Dachshunds
5) I like flavored coffee (chocolate mint and Jamaica Me Crazy, especially)
6) I am secretly thrilled that my boys are good looking and popular.

Here are the detailed instructions, carefully copied and pasted from Jakki’s site:

1. link the person who tagged you
2. mention the rules on your blog
3. list 6 unspectacular things about you
4. tag 6 other bloggers by linking them

And I tag the FOLLOWING:

Keep Your Receipt
Whiskey Marie

Ok, I am not sure how many of those people read my blog regularly, so if y’all know them, send them a shout out and let them know, will you?

Love you all…….really, I do…….just check your site meters….you’ll see that I stalk you all regularly!!


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Weekend Part Deux

Ok, so the hot tub incident. Well, I was being quite serious when SD (stepdad) tried to hoist mom from the hot tub with his belt. What I am UNCERTAIN about is if he strapped it around her and pulled or if he threw it to her like a life line and pulled.

I also was quite serious when I said that SD actually got back into the tub WITH MOM to try to lift her out by placing his arms under HER arms to try to get her up and stable footing. For a few minutes HE was stuck too....he couldn't get footing in the too slick tub. What I am uncertain of is if he went in dressed or if he undressed all over again to rescue her. Or even if he'd dressed since HIS stint in the hot tub. THIS is a question that I will not ask my mom. I do not want to know. He eventually got out.....

I was also quite serious when I said that my mom packed armfuls of bubbles from the hot tub to the sinks and shower. She has a photo of her shower stall nearly half full up the glass with bubbles---ONLY bubbles she'd taken out of the tub. She also used the sinks, so there was even more than what I got to see. She SAYS she only put a tablespoon of bubble bath in this huge tub....just like the directions said......as well as a scoop of bath salts......she was unsure as to whether or not she was supposed to use them TOGETHER.....apparently not.

I was also quite serious when my mom contemplated calling the fire department or Mr. Perfectly to rescue her. She realized when SD got into the tub with her to try to help that they were BOTH stuck in this huge tub with no phones or cellphones nearby. I think this is when she panicked. She envisioned herself calling out for help in this bed and breakfast hoping another guest or the proprietor would save them. I think this would have been more mortifying for her than to have Mr. Perfectly come in and yank her out.

My mother is youthful, and lovely, but unfortunately, no matter how you slice this, we had a 63 yr old naked, slippery woman and her 70 yr old possibly naked, slippery husband sliding through the suds trying to escape a sure hellish way to die.


As you've read, Maddison turned 5 in August, and we attended her annual birthday party. There's always lots of fun and cuteness to go around.

Here's my MOMMY and SD (in the back--Heather is in the foreground):

Here's me and son #1

Jasmine the dog didn't get to come. My brother stayed home and the dog stayed with him.

The Freshman boys won their game last Thursday night, so it was a good, fun weekend!

That's all folks!

See you tomorrow.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Slippery Slope

Did you all miss me? I missed you!

Mr. Perfectly got his telephoto lens. It keeps getting bigger, so I guess he's happy.

I imagine I'll have lots of close up pictures to show you......

Mom's visit was nice, but too short. They stayed here on Friday night and apparently, things got sort of messy. My mom and stepdad wanted a suite with a hot tub. They decided with their trip here they'd have a 'mini' vay cay and have some time to themselves.

Mom has not had alot of experience with hot tubs. I mean, neither have I, but still.....the proprietor of Cliff Manor left bath salts and bubble bath and instructions how to use them on the side of the tub. She used what she says the instructions indicated, and they were overrun with bubbles. Apparently my mom was carrying them to the shower and sinks by the armload to try to get them out of the tub......I guess by the time she was done, the shower stall was pretty full with suds. My stepdad apparently didn't gauge the heat in the tub and came up after time looking like a lobster. He encouraged mom to get in....that the jets of water would RELAX her.......she managed to get stuck. She couldn't get out of the tub. It was too slick and soapy for her to get a foothold, and she literally was stuck. She was fearful that she'd have to call the manager, the fire department or my husband to hoist her out......my stepdad even went so far as to get his belt and try to pull her out with it. He got into the tub with her and tried to LIFT her out, but to no avail.

Finally, after 40 minutes of panicked floundering, she drained the tub and put a towel down to get her footing and emerged......not relaxed, needless to say. She was laughing about it Saturday, but I supposed when it was happening it was pretty scary. She said she was glad she didn't have to call Mr. Perfectly to rescue her. Nobody is MORE glad about that than Mr. Perfectly.

Mr. Perfectly finds himself in awkward situations sometimes. Like the time he had to help my VERY elderly (but dearly loved) Great Aunt onto and off of the toilet, while my grandma had to handle the 'cleaning up' side of things. Or the time my Mom nearly was stuck in our new water bed. Or the time my mom was visiting me in the hospital after son #1 was born, and she was loudly farting (because she was laughing so hard) onto a large wooden rocking chair. The sound reverberated off the wood and echoed.

These, internet, are the things my poor husband has to endure in my family.

He also gets hurt alot while helping my dad on the farm. He's broken an arm, been bitten by cats (and had to get IV Antibiotics as a result), broken a finger, torn a tendon and other various things........ and he still puts up with us.....

Anyway, we had a birthday party for Maddi, and although I promised, I'm afraid I didn't get many pictures of Mom. I have a couple and will post them.....I have some of me and son #1 that turned out good.......son #2 was sitting away from my grasp, so he managed to escape motherly embraces for photos. Not to worry, I'll get him later.

I realized today that I haven't told you one of my idiosyncrasies. I can't suck on hard candies. I immediately chew them up and annihilate them. I do it with suckers, mints and any hard candies I try to eat. I start with the goal to suck them, but it never works out. I ALWAYS chew them up. What's up with that? It's probably some deep seated psychological thing or something. I'm sure it can be analyzed like my snake dreams.

Well, that's it for now, folks. I know it was RIVETING conversation, but that's all I've got this late on a Monday........I wasn't going to post even, but I thought that some of you may actually want to see what I have to say, so I decided to give you a small peek into the weirdness of my world.

Toodles for now!!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

I’m going to need to have a chat with my dogs today

Not only is my MOMMY and Stepdad coming for a visit, so is their dog, Jasmine. Jasmine is the calmest, mildest mannered dog I’ve ever met. She’s pleasant, and obedient. She’s CUTE, and basically an all around perfect dog. She’s house trained, she doesn’t bark or growl…..I just love her.

Buster and Copper, however, are untrainable BOORS, that will behave like stupid schoolboys as soon as the Maternal crew arrives. Copper will race around the room looking for an open gob to French Kiss, Buster will bark, and growl and demand to be petted and there will be MUCH tail wagging and butt sniffing (from the canines, not the humans……puhleeezzzz!!).

I need to explain to them that Jasmine is their AUNTIE, and cannot be expected to tolerate their barking, humping and general mayhem. That she’s a genteel lady that is deserving of them giving up their beds and food…..that she should go through doors first, and be treated regally. Do you think they’ll buy it? Buster will roll his eyes and flip me off when I’m not looking, and Copper will not process the information until AFTER Auntie Jasmine has left (OHHHH…..she didn’t want me to BOTHER the hottie of an Auntie).

The house REEKS of onions. I know……”Welcome, Mom!! To the house of ONIONS”….it’s really bad. Mr. Perfectly tried Febreeze, and a potpourri of apples and cinnamon boiling on the stove….NOTHING worked. Our house stinks like dogs anyway….at least I assume it does, since my housekeeping skills are sorely lacking, and we have two dogs…..it’s inevitable…..Oh, well….maybe Jasmine will like it.

I will give you a glimpse into my work life. I have vowed not to blog about work, except in generalities, and so far have managed to accomplish that for the most part. So, anyway, we had an office party for a co-worker’s 40th birthday. There was lots of non-work and eating happening…..Jakki decided that she wanted to take a picture of me. Why? I have no clue. So as she was fiddling with her camera….. I gave her a pose. And instead of FIDDLING WITH THE SETTINGS on the camera….she took a photo……..of the ‘pose’.

Why, you ask, are you blogging about it? Why not? I generally embarrass myself in SOME way, shape or form during any given day, why is this any different? Besides, it’s fabulous blog fodder……and you can see YET ANOTHER one of my $5 shirts. Oh…….here’s the ‘real’ picture she took as well.

Welcome to my world, Internet. I promise that I washed that finger, so now we can shake hands and say we officially know each other!!

This is my FRIDAY---woo hoo……I do love my Friday’s on a Thursday! Oh, keep your fingers crossed that the Freshman team WINS THEIR GAME tonight………(in the rain……watch the frizz happen in front of your EYES).

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I don't compare myself to a pit bull

So, I heard back from Son #2's coach. He was very nice. He told me that something like 13 of the 50 kids were 'sick' or 'hurt' and couldn't practice, and unfortunately, Son #2 took the brunt of that one........He spoke to Son #2 and made amends. All boys that didn't practice that day got bumped down in their positions, but Coach assured mine that he WILL see game time tomorrow, and even may play quite a bit.

My MOMMY is coming tomorrow. I'm excited. My brother may come as well. That is Heather's (my niece) dad, and The Rock Star Princess's grandpa. Yep, grandpa. He was 34 when Maddi was born...I call him the youngest grandpa ever. This makes me think of Crissy's post, and the decision to have a baby---just think Crissy----you COULD be a grandma..........

Anyway, I'm excited about my mom visiting. She's a total gem, and I dont' see her often enough.

I am making French Onion Soup to put in the fridge, so after the game tomorrow, we can have something decent to eat..........we'll pop it into crocks, and add toasted bread and cheese, and OH MY.......I nabbed a recipe from the Food Network....Tyler Florence to be exact, and it's some mighty fine soup.........try it if you are so inclined.........it's super easy, but cooking the onions down takes a bit of time.

I am off work on Friday to hang out with mom......WOOT WOOT. I love my time off work!!

It seems like there was something IMPORTANT I wanted to share, but for the life of riley, I cannot think of what it was.

OHHHHHHH.....I know---IT'S A NEW GHOST HUNTERS tonight. I'm stinking up my house with 4 huge onions cooking down and topping it all off with ghosts. If I have crazy ass dreams like I did LAST night, I'll be peeved. Mr. Perfectly better be more sympathetic to my ghost fear than he was to my paralyzing SNAKE fear.

Does anyone else have problems with the FREE CREDIT REPORT DOT COM commercials resonating in your brain? I know, I know, I've talked about this before, but I have a real problem with it. The jingles just rattle around up there and WON'T GO AWAY. Mr. Perfectly thinks it's just TOO FUNNY to play them repeatedly for my OCD pleasure.

Took son #2 to get his mop top shorn.......coach doesn't want to see their hair sticking out under the helmet.........he's not happy with his new sort of traditional boy haircut. The back and sides looks like a reglar boy hair cut--over the ears and trimmed on the neck. The FRONT however, is still shaggy and sort of long-ish.....

Well, that's all the stuff I've got tonight.........real exciting, huh? Welcome to the life of a football mom..........BORING. I rarely wear lipstick, either.

I'll let you know tomorrow how the ghost show goes....and if I slept well through the fear and onion smell.........

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Tequila really DOES make your clothes fall off!!

So, last night was Monday---and what does that mean? $1.50 margaritas! Teenie and I went out on the town…….pigged out (seriously---this go around we didn’t share….we each got dinner), and drank margaritas.

Since when I mention the $1.50 margarita phenomenon, I generally get a comment or two from the “oh-my-gosh-I’d-be-drunk-all-the-time-for-$1.50-margaritas” set, I thought, for your viewing pleasure to take some pics of the food, the drinks and of US!!

Teenie's Grilled Chicken Nachos (that's cheese, not beans)

My Camerones El Jimador

The Sopapilla!!

It was a lot of fun. The first margarita was the best—I think they rope you in with a good strong one, then make them weaker………I had THREE (3), and although was happy, certainly not what I’d expect from 3 margaritas……maybe it was the heavy food too…..mmmmmmmmmmm.

Here's Teenie!

And Me with messed up bangs and a CUTE new shirt!!

I took pictures of the food, and of Teenie, but we wanted one together too…so we tried to take a photo holding the camera in front of us…..it didn’t work so well, so a cute waiter took pity on us and took a very nice picture for us.

The failed photo:

The good photo:

You all can glimpse my BREEZIES SUPPORT BRA peeking out in the photo..the straps are not conducive to wearing wider neck tops......

And finally, the BILL....for you non believers........Pretty cheap, eh?

Mr. Perfectly drove me to the restaurant, since I fully intended on drinking at least 2 margaritas---but Teenie took me home instead of Mr. Perfectly coming back to get me. We got into her car, and she put on her seatbelt, and realized her blouse was UNBUTTONED to the middle……..Teenie is VERY modest….she doesn’t let ANYONE see her nudie, so she was pretty worried that the cute teenage looking waiter wanted to take our pictures because her blouse was unbuttoned to her navel……but alas, that wasn’t the case…the buttons must have popped while putting the seatbelt on, because as you can see by the photo, she’s fully clothed. She made me PROMISE I wouldn’t post anything that may prove to be embarrassing. All this hoop-la-la was taking place between us LAUGHING OUR BUTTS OFF because when she realized her blouse was unbuttoned she loudly exclaimed “Tequila really DOES make your clothes fall off”….hilarity ensued.

I had the strangest dreams early this morning. Stoogie, you’ll be proud to know that you were in one of them. I was at a dentist office with SOMEBODY (I have no clue who) and we were making impressions of our teeth. I was really worried that the goop would be nasty and I’d gag, so I did my OWN impressions while waiting in the waiting room. I looked at the colorful comic section of a newspaper and saw a comic strip from STOOGEPIE……..I picked it up and was exclaiming to my dentist cohort who Stoogie was and this was his COMIC…..OMG!! I picked up the paper and was reading it every way from Sunday to try to figure out WHO Stoogie was…..there were oodles of names and corporations and stuff listed as the author, and I never could put a name to Stoogie. I then spat out my yellow goop with the teeth impressions I had made, and the dentist lady was impressed that I’d done it all by myself , and was complimenting my abilties…..then she BIT THE LOWER IMPRESSION in half…..with her MOUTH……..it totally grossed me out………..cause y’all know that spit is disgusting to me.

THEN right before alarm time I dreamed of snakes. I don’t like snakes. I’m afraid of snakes. As a child I had a recurring ‘snake’ dream. I never saw the snakes, but I was descending into an industrial type building…the stairs were those metal ones with holes in them? It was all dark and echo-ey---I could hear the HISSING and the snakes slithering all over each other……..it was TERRIFYING. But early this morning, I was dreaming that I was at my Mom’s house (it wasn’t really Mom’s, but you know how dreams go) and I looked out the back door and saw the HUGEST snake I’d ever seen coming out of a hole in the ground. It was using it’s scales and muscles to power up through the dirt and it’s MOUTH was wide open………you could see it rippling, and the UPPER body of the snake was standing UPRIGHT….you know, like a cobra……..it had to have been like 10 ft long or more. I freaked out and turned around and there were snakes in the house!! There was mysteriously a tree growing in the middle of Mom’s kitchen, and there were SNAKES in the tree, and a cat CHASING snakes……..I ran to get my mom and she was stooped over searching for snakes, and I was screaming “they’re in the trees….the cat is chasing them” and she’d LOOK and never see them. Then I woke up…….and neither Mr. Perfectly nor Buster the dog felt sorry for me. But I know you will, Internet, because you all have the LOVE for me……….

Oh, and finally I’m awaiting a response from son #2’s football coach. I did it, and went all MAMA on the man………my baby was sick---SICK and couldn’t practice yesterday. Coach wouldn’t listen to him, proceeded to apparently talk behind son’s back in the locker room to the other coaches IN FRONT OF THE OTHER KIDS, and told son #2 he would lose his 1st string position if he didn’t practice.

Son #2 had gone to the nurse, and was told he was running a fever. He had body aches and felt nauseated. I assumed he may have a stomach bug…but as it turned out, it was a SEVERE migraine. He laid in bed last night for 5 HOURS waiting for the pain to abate….he kept trying to hydrate himself while not PUKING. Poor baby…he’s had migraines since he was about 7. He has a pediatric neurologist that sees him a couple of times a year, and management is about all we can do for him. He CANNOT take imitrex, and other prophylactic treatments make him really foggy and upset his stomach…..so he’s got it rough sometimes.

Anyway, if the coach takes his 1st string position away, than so be it. That’s his job as a coach, but he better give my kid an EAR and not talk about him in front of other kids next time……that’s just wrong. Son #2 wasn’t even allowed to explain what was wrong…….. so I sent an email to coachie boy……..and so far NOTHING. It may hurt sons place on the team….I sure hope it doesn’t.

Toodles for now. Have a happy Tuesday!

Monday, September 8, 2008

Monday Musings

It is FUTILE to try to apply makeup when allergy season is in full force. I got up late this morning, and showered and sat down to put on my makeup…my eyes were running, my NOSE was running, I was sneezing and COPIOUS amounts of snot were being produced.

I gave it the old college try, though. My nose is scaly and Rudolph-esque, and I’m sure my mineral makeup fused with the eye liquid to make an actual liquid makeup……it was seriously a mess.

So, what did YOU all do this weekend? Well, my in-laws made a surprise visit on Saturday morning. We went to Dillard's and shopped the 75% off sales (take an additional 50% off the already 75% off prices). I got 9 shirts…NINE people for about $45. I got to the checkout area and watched my $4 and $5 purchases ring up and went for my debit card. NOTHING. No wallet, NOTHING. My checkbook was in my purse, but my wallet was missing in action. Of course, I couldn’t write a check without any identification, so my mother-in-law paid for them. My wallet ended up being left at my office on Friday, so I went to the bank with Mr. Perfectly’s card, and she refused my pay back……so I essentially got 9 shirts for FREE.. It was really nice of her to buy them for me, but when she pulled out her credit card, I figured it was a quick cover for my lost wallet…….but she wouldn’t take my money. Thanks Mom-In-Law!!

We went to Red Lobster for lunch---again, they paid---which was quite nice. We’d already made plans with Perfectly’s Dad to go here---the Missouri River Valley Steam Engine Association’s BACK TO THE FARM REUNION in Booneville, MO. The in-laws decided to go with us…me, Mr. Perfectly, Son #2 and Girlfriend, Perfectly’s dad and the in-laws all trekked up to the wonder that only rural Missouri Entertainment can offer. There were tractors EVERYWHERE. We went originally to the tractor pull…….Mr. Perfectly took this picture of me next to a tractor because just LOOK AT THE NAME……….these old farmers are nothing but Horn Dogs……….

We finally got our dads pulled away from the tractor pull and we went over to the fairground area to witness lots of junk vendors, some displays of corn meal grinding, ice cream making, kettle corn making and THIS (disregard my fat ass).

DICKS. He makes the BEST horseradish imaginable. We usually find him at the annual Pumpkin Festival in October, but he said this year he may not be there….because of high booth prices and gas prices…….he said so many younger people go to that festival, and don’t have any money, that it wasn’t worth it. Whew, I’m sure glad he was at the Steam Engine show….because I’ve GOT to get my DICKS horseradish every year. It’s $6.50 per 12 oz jar or $12 for a 24 oz jar, and he makes regular horseradish and get this…..CRANBERRY horseradish…….I KNOW…..it sounds gross, but it is AWESOME…just awesome. I have a jar of each in my freezer, just WAITING for some use. Go HERE for his website. ORDER FROM HIM…….it’s good. He’s even got recipes. I love me some DICKS………

Then the in-laws wanted to go to the Isle of Capri casino…to eat and to gamble. We tried to eat at Farraddays’, and the suckers wouldn’t seat us. The SAID it was because there were 7 of us and it would be a 45 minute wait—unless we wanted to sit in the bar, with some tables shoved together. Since none of us smoke, the smoky bar was out of the question. Personally, I think it was because we looked like 7 hicks that just came from the BACK TO THE FARM REUNION. We were all in t-shirts and jeans, and I somehow think that FARRADDAYS thought we were too unkempt for their hoity-toity ala carte menu. So we begrudgingly went to Calypso’s Buffet. My Mother-in-law wasn’t pleased. She doesn’t ‘serve herself’, but aside from that little blip on the radar, and the fact that our waitress was totally kicked out of charm school, it turned out to be just fine. It was SURF-N-TURF night, so there was all you can eat shrimp (fried and boiled) and all you can eat CRAB LEGS and prime rib and 3 buffet lines of STUFF. It was totally awesome. I went for Crab Legs 2 times….and that’s all I ate! Other than dessert……some sort of mint crème pie, and part of a pastry and some chocolate covered strawberries. Holy crap, what a night…..unlimited, butter drenched crab legs and dessert! Screw You Farraddays………the buffet may have been loud and alcohol free, but it was some GOOD FOOD.

Then came the bad news. The in-laws and Perfectly’s dad went to gamble. Perfectly wanted to go SO BAD. Horseradish, Crab legs and nickel slots…..WHAT MORE COULD A GIRL WANT?? But, remember my wallet being at work? NO FREAKING IDENTIFICATION…..so I couldn’t get on the boat. I was sad. Mr. Perfectly, however, was thrilled that I wasn’t going to enter the brightly lit arena and throw his money down into machines that don’t readily give his money BACK. I’m like a raccoon…..shiny, and bright attracts me…..I don’t care if it doesn’t pay. So we left….and went home. Oh, we didn’t pay for dinner either….so other than some horseradish and a couple of sodas and gas…….we had a pretty fun FREE day of family adventure.

Yesterday, I did some laundry, washed some dishes, went grocery shopping. All the things that needed to be done (well not ALL of them, but at least I felt like I wasn’t TOTALLY gross by leaving EVERYTHING undone). I made my asian lettuce wraps, and we had a grand evening. Mr. Perfectly ran out to the local Democratic campaign office to pick up tickets for Joe Biden’s visit to Columbia Mo tomorrow. I fell asleep in the chair and was startled like YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE when he came home. I was so out of it, I asked him where he’d been…..he’d only been gone 20 minutes……..so I toddled off to bed and didn’t even finish the DVR’d Big Brother.

My MOMMY is coming for a visit. I’m so excited. She’s coming for round #3 of Maddison’s birthday celebration this weekend……..so I’ll have pictures and funny stories, I assume. She’s a dream boat…..and funny to boot! You’ll all love her as much as I do.

See you soon!

Friday, September 5, 2008


Walking to the bathroom and seeing someone in our reception area. Noting, with disdain, his very, VERY large Huraches, and jovial “I’m such a cool guy” attitude. Getting into the bathroom stall and realizing my fly was down and gaping WIDE OPEN.

Happy Friday…..it’s my FAVORITE day!!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

One Up

I know someone who CONSTANTLY tries to ‘one up’ anyone she’s having a conversation with. She’s had a WORSE illness, or experience, or has MORE knowledge of subjects, or her FAMILY has experienced things worse, or has more knowledge…..and every conversation ends up turned around and being about her.

This person can NEVER allow another to have a moment in the spotlight……because HER experiences are so vastly greater than the other…..that she must publicly express how much MORE she knows about it. She demands people take her advice, and seems quite peeved when we don’t.

This person ALSO takes issue with another individual……person #1 complains INCESSANTLY that person #2 is always ‘one upping’ everyone? HUH? Slackjawed looks all around? Hello, doesn’t she SEE what she’s saying?

I have begun thinking about this phenomenon…..this ‘one upping’. I do it…..I’ll be talking to someone, and they’ll say something generic, like “I haven’t been sleeping well”. I’ll pipe up and say “me either!! I’ve been taking benedryl all week to try to sleep….maybe THAT would help you” But is that really ‘one upping’? Is it taking the other persons’ experience and making it all about YOU?

I do it on blogs………I recount my experiences that mimic the bloggers point….I’ll add my two cents in where maybe it doesn’t belong. Maybe I’M one upping and people are looking at me all slackjawed wondering how I don’t SEE how annoying I am.

Is there a fine line between casual conversation….and learning about others and sharing about yourself and ONE UPPING? I personally think so……

My personality traits run parallel to this one upper I know….and I try my best to be cognizant of this fact…..so I don’t annoy others, but I’m sure that I do things just like her that really piss people off…..I don’t WANT to be like that. I tend to INSIST that others take my advice….when I realize I’m being pushy, I try very hard to back down……but by then the damage may be done…..

So, does it bother you guys when I comment on your blogs about MY similar experiences? Does it make you all want to strangle me when I recount MY story in YOUR comments? Or does it endear me to you because you KNOW more about me???

I’m just thinking out loud, I guess. We tend to dislike in others some of the things we do ourselves…….

I tried, really TRIED to finish Ghost Hunters yesterday. I failed. I took BENEDRYL for my terribly runny nose---can’t tell if it’s cold or allergy….and I was GONE……SOUND ASLEEP by 9pm…and we’ DVR’d Ghost Hunters, and didn’t start watching it until 8:30 or so…..so DON’T TELL me if they saw ghosts…….I’ll finish it this afternoon. I also need to find out what sorts of deadly ailments I may have by watching my DVR’d episode of Dr. OZ on Oprah. Jeez, he scares me. He makes me think I have EVERYTHING he talks about….then I google it, then I’m a mess.

Hurricane Gustav has brought his tropical rains to Missouri. It’s been raining for 2 days now. Which is good….I mean we need rain, but *sigh* it is SUCH a drag.

I am not watching the RNC……I know I should….to further educate myself…but I just can’t. I will politicize my feelings about ONE topic, though…….I do think the media needs to lay off Sarah Palin’s daughter. Those of us with kids KNOW that our kids will do things we DO NOT WANT THEM TO…no matter how we parent them. This is not a Democrat or Republican or Independent issue…it’s a problem with ALL people and their teenagers. We cannot be with our kids 24/7, and despite our best efforts, our kids WILL engage in behavior we don’t want them to. The Palins are dealing with this as any other family would need to, and the nation needs to BUTT OUT.

I guess that’s about all…..I had several things I wanted to bring up that I thought of in the shower, but of course, that was earlier today, and I’ve forgotten!!

Happy Thursday, all!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008


Ok, I've got a new obsession. It will be short lived, I'm sure, but still......right now, I am thinking, wishing, etc.

Remember how I wanted a donate-a-thon so Perfectly could get a new porch/siding, and an anniversary at the Ritz and Amazing Grace products? Huh? Remember? Um....by the way, nobody offered up any cash yet...but ASIDE from that.....I've gotten a new want.

A new bathroom. Well, not a new bathroom......but to update the one we've got. Our house was built in the early 60's. We bought it before housing prices rose dramatically in the 90's. Our home has doubled in value in 15 years. It's a 1475 sq ft 'raised ranch' home....about 1100 sq. feet up and about 375 down. The basement is finished, but we don't really use it.....we've got weight equipment, a desk and a small tv area for the boys......and their video games......it needs alot of work all over. We've always lived on a really tight budget, and household updates have been low on the totem pole of life. Oh, raised ranch, I've learned, means different things in different parts of the country. Around here, it means you walk into the basement level foyer, and instead of 'split', you go up a full flight of stairs to the 'ranch' layout.......

In the mid to late 90's we did update the kitchen with new flooring, and countertops. We painted the existing cabinets white, and put new flooring in the bath. It made a huge difference....HUGE....but of course, I was overzealous when choosing colors, because now the kitchen is quite 'dated' and although it was trendy for the time, it wasn't a good 'timeless' choice.

We desperately need a new porch---the existing one is disgusting, and we are the ones bringing property values down in the neighborhood, but we've never really been able to afford it. We still can't so donations will still be accepted!!

Here's a picture of our house.....it doesn't show all the warts on the porch, and belive me....there is NOTHING nice about the porch........

So anyway, despite the fact we need alot of MAJOR work done on the outside and in places in the house, it's all cosmetic.......Mr. Perfectly and I took a trip to HOOD'S today---do y'all have HOODS? I don't even know how to describe it.....it's like a junk drop off for overstock of the Lowe's and Home Depot's of America.........

For instance, today, we saw a variety of wine glasses with "1994 PROM" etched onto them. First of all.....if you are going to PROM...one doesn't NEED wine glasses, now does one? Secondly....1994? But this illustrates my point. Alot of junky stuff.

But, they also have, unfinished, un-assembled wine racks...you can paint or stain them.......it would be cute in a nook area....and they have these weird things called CARPET SQUARES.....they sort of stick by themselves, to a smooth surface. We actually bought them for our stairs when we thought we'd re-finish them. HA, which never happened, but still...they work......so we went looking for carpet squares for our basement.........to cover the pink schoolhouse tile from the 60's. We didn't find any, but guess what we DID find?

Tile. 12x12 tiles for 49 cents apiece. They are gray with splatters of black and white throughout them. Now before you scoff.......The original tub, stool and sink in our bathroom are GRAY.......so we laid black/white linoleum years ago, which now looks terrible. So, these tiles would be PERFECT for the bath...and it would provide an updated look. Our gray sink is rusting around the drain. Boo Hoo...because to go to Lowes and custom order even a plain old sink in gray would be HUNDREDS of dollars.......and Hoods has one for $29.95. Now it wouldn't fit our current sink hole, but they also have laminate COUNTER TOPS.......now don't scoff at the laminate.....remember....this is what most would think of as a starter home.......and laminate would be just FINE compared to what is there now. Counter tops are $4 a foot. So, to outfit this bathroom would cost us about $25 in tile, about $25 in counter tops and $30 for a sink. Now this doesn't include grout and time involved and things to update further like light fixtures and a mirror, but for the BASICS........$80......so what if it isn't granite? Granite is hard to care for anyway, and you all have HEARD about my lack of cleaning prowess.

Mr. Perfectly is worried that he wouldn't do a very good job. But it's so beat up right now, it CAN'T be any worse.......and it would be NEW.......

As I mentioned, we bought this house for nothing....compared to prices today, that is. Our house payment is less than most car payments these days. No Joke. That includes the property tax and insurance........so living where I live may be lame at times, but you can't beat the cost......the house next door sold recently, and it listed for 95,000. One down the road that is asthetically similar to ours (only more updated) is listed for 112,500. One 3 houses up is rumored to be on the market for 120,000. You all do the math and figure out a range of what we paid for this baby......With two headed to college (one next year), a low house payment will be NECESSARY.......I can't even imagine living in a city where housing prices are out of reach, and you get less than what we've already got. I was watching house hunters and the HOMES......there were homes on the West Coast (I Assume) that were smaller than ours for $450,000. I can't even imagine. That kind of money around here would buy a near mansion.......

So, 80 bucks for a bath re-do? I think we should do it. It will cost more, because of tile cutter rental, grout, mirrors, etc.....we may need a new vanity, which would put the project off for a while, but we are talking about buying the tile, sink and countertop for now....just to have it before they run out....It's a warehouse for overstock, so once they are out...they are out.......

What do you all think? It's our only full bath, so 4 of us use it in shifts DAILY......our second half bath needs work too, but it's downstairs, and unless there's an 'emergency' we just don't use it much.

Come on to Missouri folks....cheap housing and $1.50 margaritas on Mon. and Thurs! We can live in the same neighborhood and party!!

Happy Wednesday!

Oh,I nearly forgot.....a new episode of Ghost Hunters airs tonight (at least it's SUPPOSED to)........aren't you EXCITED? It's been way too long.......get ready, Mr. Perfectly, for 2 am house checking!! He forbade me to watch any more 'I was bitten' stories on TLC, since I made him examine our bed all over for brown recluse spiders........he didn't appreciate my fear........it was a really nasty thing....this brown recluse......I didn't want one in MY bed.......would you? Therefore, I didn't think my request for a bed examination for spiders was unusual or too much to ask!! Therefore, I think it should be acceptable for him to check for ghosts at 2am when I hear mysterious noises in the house.


Tuesday, September 2, 2008


Yeah....you better read this and COMMENT people, because we don't know if or when this moment may happen again. I want accolades and site hits to me and Mr. Perfectly's site...because he's where all the info comes from and I imagine there will be NEWSPAPER RECOGNITION, so check his too......it's here.

My baby.....MAH BABY.....scored the WINNING TOUCHDOWN in the Freshman game yesterday. YES HE DID........It was MY BABY...!!!!! I have PICTURES to prove it!

We drove to St. Louis yesterday for the 10 a.m. game against the McCluer North freshman. It promised to be hot. I don't do hot. I filled up a bag with towels, wet wipes, a water mister and sunscreen. I loaded up my face and scalp with sunscreen BEFORE WE LEFT(so my scalp doesn't burn and then peel, causing me to explain to everyone I see that it isn't REALLY dandruff....but peeling skin from a sunburn) The visitor section faced the hot sun..OF COURSE.....but there was a breeze....thank god for the breeze, because I may have given up and missed the MOMENT........

Anyway, our local high school team has had an issue with fumbling.......this issue has been an ongoing one for years.....unfortunately the curse seems to have been passed on to our Freshman boys as well......we gave up points right away in the game. I don't know all the terminology, but at halftime it was them 14, US......2.....yes 2....as in TWO. The first half of the game went by quickly...and relatively cool....then halftime hit.....the sun was high above, and we were losing. Badly. It sucked. It was hot...at some point some other peoples kid got a touchdown for our team......yeah, great....JUST HURRY UP....Mr. Perfectly brought me an umbrella to keep the sun off, so I looked like a nerd sitting in the stands with an umbrella. But I DIDN'T CARE.........the other team had the ball.....yada yada yada......suddenly I saw a commotion on the field.....and some kid...one of ours...had the ball suddenly....and made a touchdown.......IT WAS #32.....WHO IS MY KID!!! I was screaming, and bobbing the umbrella like CRAZY screaming to the 10 other parents in my area...."that was MY SON.....THAT WAS MY SON". They patiently nodded and clapped.

The boys were all hugging son #2, and I think there was a yellow flag, so tension prevailed for a moment until the referees proclaimed that my BABY'S touchdown counted!! I was hoping the team would carry Son #2 on their shoulders to the sidelines, but that didn't happen....but that's ok....I'll send a memo, so if it should happen again, they'll do it.

Son #2 is a defensive player. Defensive players don't usually get the ball....because they are DEFENSE, not OFFENSE. Apparently, son #2 'stripped' the ball from the other teams' quarterback (QB) and ran for a touchdown.....it was awesome.

Here are a series of photos......MY KID IS #32......THIRTY TWO......32......There are alot, and I want you to LOOK AT THEM ALL.....and revel in his heroic actions to save the game!!!

After the game, fresh as a daisy!!

Okay, didja all look CAREFULLY at each photo? Huh? Examine them CLOSELY, because I want you to. I'm A PROUD MAMA!

Thanks for looking...Mr. Perfectly keeps his sports blog for all kids and parents so he can't openly brag about Son #2.....but lets hope there's a newspaper mention!

Woo Hoo...go Jays Freshman!!!

Happy Tuesday!