Friday, November 28, 2008

Black Friday

Hi everyone. Hope you all had a FABULOUS Thanksgiving. I did.

I missed my mom and grandma terribly. I felt bad when Mom called me yesterday---but all in all, it's best for Grandma, and we WILL make a trip in the next two weeks.

Aside from THAT, I had a lovely Thanksgiving. Mr. Perfectly planned and executed the menu nearly from beginning to end. My only duties for the day was to make pecan pies (one regular and one chocolate pecan), and to make the broth for Chicken Noodle soup. This is the alternative to Turkey that Mr. P. wanted for dinner. With HOMEMADE egg noodles. Yum. It's one of our favorite meals. We top mashed potatoes with the homemade chicken noodle soup. Yes, I's carb overkill, but man...let me tell you....unless you've had it, DON'T KNOCK IT. Obviously, this isn't a menu we eat regularly-----but OMG...when we do eat's knock your socks off good.

We had a raw veggie tray to help offset the lack of fiber in the meal itself....with raw tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, celery and green onion. Mr. P. also tried to make "Jessie Rolls" that I so failed at on Sunday. His weren't perfect, either. We apparently have a learning curve to perfect them. I will honestly say that the first two times I made them, they were pretty good. The 3rd time sucked and when Mr. P made them.....meh---just okay. Although, I didn't bake them, so I appreciate his dinner more than you and he will ever know.

We got up this morning at 3am to go shopping on 'Black Friday'. We went right back to sleep. We got up around 6 am to do the same and hit the mall. I wanted the free snow globe from JC Penneys......they were out. I should have been there at 4am when they opened. I am very disappointed. I've gotten the free JC Penneys's snow globe for at least the last 5 years if not more. **sigh** Laziness gets you NOWHERE.

We went to Lowes and got quite the deal. They'd advertised 14 gal 'Shop Vacs' with a 4.5 horse power motor for $29. They were sold out by the time we arrived. Another customer had 2 in his cart, when I asked him where he'd gotten them. He told me, but also told me they were completely out of the advertised product. But some dude that worked at Lowe's told him that they'd sell the 5.5 HORSEPOWER similar one for the same price. I went looking. There was only one left, and my cart was overflowing full. I found Mr. P, and sent him to the Shop Vac section and tracked down (stalked) the customer I'd talked to before to see WHO had agreed to such a deal.......and he pointed out some guy....whom I asked about substituting the shop vacs. He told me 'NO'. That they weren't substituting anything. I TOLD him that the OTHER GUY was getting a deal--and he said that there had been a miscommunication and that the big manager dude said 'no substitutions'. I stalked (tracked down) that other guy AGAIN in his checkout line and told him they weren't giving me the same deal as he got....and he whispered that the girl was ringing his up as $29 right then, and I should try coming through her line. Mr. P was at this point dragging the full cart AND the Shop Vac up to my location, and we got into line with the same lady that rang up the mysterious guy I'd been talking to all morning. I just said to her that we wanted the same deal he got, and she said "Yeah, I know", and rang it through as $29!!!! A $90 shop vac with 14 gal capacity and a 5.5 horsepower motor was OURS!!!

We also got a new over the stove microwave, some storage containers, a flashlight and 2 poinsettias. Whew. All for $148.00. Mr. P is now trying to install a brand spanking new Microwave.

Ph.d. and her husband came over with their dogs for a few minutes this morning. Wow. 5 dogs in this tiny house is quite the feat. Dex spent most of his time humping Lester, their almost 6 month old basset hound--If you read my blog YOU'VE SEEN HIS BABY PICTURES!! Not only did 7 lb Dex hump the 35 lb Lester, Dex also proceeded to lick Lester's....well....'private parts'. Lester is neutered, so there's not much left, but what was there was licked by baby puppy dachshund. It was sort of embarrassing.

Heather then called and wanted to go to lunch. Her favorite place is my Mexican place that has the Margarita's that I so I joined her and Maddie (who is 5) and Heather's sister, Mia...who is ALSO 5. I partook in a Jumbo Margarita, ate lunch, and then we all went to Kohl's. Their early bird specials were supposed to be gone at 1 pm, and we got there at 2 pm. But, I've been to Kohl's before when they've announced an extension of their early bird deals due to great demand. Sure enough, as we walked in the doors, they were announcing that the specials would end at 3pm instead of 1pm. I bought a purse (which I have an addiction to---it's orange, and slouchy, and's wonderful), and 3 towels and a down comforter for Son #1. He sleeps all curled up in various throw sized blankets and I thought he finally deserved a full sized comforter of his own.

So, here I sit......debating the idea of going to buy a WHITE Christmas tree this year. Talk me out of it,'s wrong to have as many Christmas trees in our house as we do. We have 3 artificial ones. THREE we use, one is too big for our tiny little house (and HELLO.......pre lit trees? Once you go pre-lit, you NEVVVVAAAAA go back) and a fiber optic one we took from my Grandma Winnie's house after she died. I'm too sad to put that one up. Besides, it's only a 3 footer. I keep thinking white tree, with silver, brown and light turquoise ornaments..........can you IMAGINE? The lovliness? THE EXPENSE? THE STUPIDNESS when we have a perfectly good (albeit scrawny) tree that we got for $25 a few years ago. Pre-lit with 400 measly lights.

I'd take another scrawny 400 light tree....IN WHITE.....and decorate it all cutsey......Wal Mart has them.......I NEED AN INTERVENTION!!

Well, that's all I've got for now. I've got pictures, but none are loaded onto my profile yet, and since I'm computer illiterate, it'll have to wait til Mr. P. gets the new microwave installed and for him to have time to deal with photos. For my Blog. Nothing important, you know.

hahah...just joking honey.....take your time.......I understand!!!!

Happy Day after Thanksgiving people!!!!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I suck

No, seriously……We planned on going to Des Moines for Thanksgiving---with Mom, and my Step-dad, and my grandma/grandpa and Uncle and cousins.

My grandma, who is 85, had her knee replaced at the end of October. She’s had quite a difficult recovery---two weeks ago she wasn’t keeping any food or drink down---and the doctors don’t know why. The admitted her to the hospital and ran tests and came up with the fact that she may be reacting to all the medication she’s on. Oh….and to back this story up….the week after she had the knee replaced, she ended up having to have the incision re-opened and debrieded---she had a staph infection.

So, here she is, 85, having 2 surgeries back to back, and reacting to her medication PLUS plugging away at her re-hab---she’s quite weak. She finally started eating on Sunday (this past Sunday) she said.

With Son #1’s girlfriend having a stomach bug, we’ve been fearful if HE comes down with it that we’d take it to Des Moines with us. We’ve been on guard, waiting to see if he gets what SHE has. I went ahead and made hotel (Motel?) reservations. We picked a place that will allow pets so we could take Dex –and show him off, and not board him. He’s such a sweet baby puppy----and he needs socialization. He’s doing GREAT on his housetraining, so we thought this trip would be FABULOUS for him.

Anyway---yesterday my nose was drippy all day—this isn’t unusual. I have pretty terrible hay fever type allergies, so my nose almost ALWAYS runs. I got home and had more than normal head congestion. I called my Mom to visit with her, and she immediately noticed my lovely nasal sounding voice. I was still hoping it would be allergies, but overnight it appears it isn’t. I have a standard head cold. It isn’t bad---but the fear of giving grandma ANY type of illness is so great. If she’d get a cold or a stomach bug or something, it could be DEVASTATING for her in her present state of health. I went to the doctor for routine bloodwork (cholesterol, etc), and asked for a flu shot. They took one look at my runny nose and congested voice and said ‘nope’ not til you are over your cold. I said…’what if it’s allergies??” And she wouldn’t give in.

So, we aren’t going to Des Moines. I feel almost like a failure----We didn’t go last year due to a bizarre weather pattern that lasted all of 10 hours or something, but prevented us from travelling. I’m worried they’ll think I’m fabricating excuses!! But, mostly I miss my grandma and mom. I was looking forward to their cooking and being with them.

I’m at work, and at times I think ‘hey….maybe I’m better….maybe it IS allergies’, then another round of sneezing starts, and the waterworks go in full force. I have a headache and am tired, so I assume it’s a cold. Although, I’ll never be certain….but rather than chance giving something to Grandma, I’ll just wait.

So, now I’m at work, and have to shop for stuff for some semblance of a dinner tomorrow.

Toodles for now. Take a moment and feel sorry for me. THEN be thankful for whatever you are thankful for.

Monday, November 24, 2008

It's Thanksgiving!

We had Thanksgiving at Perfectly's Dad's Sunday. It was very nice. Stressful at moments, but overall, very nice. Dad tends to get.....well.....TENSE when there are lots of people around to impress. I took 3 bottles of wine to help alleviate the tension (except Perfectly's dad really doesn't drink), and lo and behold the In-Laws brought another 3 bottles! Oh.....who all was there? It was quite a party!!

Me, Mr. P, Son #1 and his new girlfriend, son #2 and Girlfriend, Heather, Maddie, my brother, my in-laws, Teenie and HER son#2. Did I forget anyone? was all the 'family'.

As mentioned before, we have quite a small family---and to me it's so nice to be able to include in-laws, and BFF's in the mix.........

My goal was to arrive at 9:30 am to start the "Jessie Rolls". My great aunt Jessie made the very best yeast rolls we've ever eaten. I, of course, never KNEW that maybe I'd NEED her secret info someday. You KNOW....she was going to make Jessie Rolls FOREVER. But, my impatient self never paid Aunt Jessie much attention when she MADE the now trying to re-create them is nearly impossible. They weren't so good. A little heavy and overcooked.

But anyway, I didn't get there til 10 am....and Heather, who was my trusty helper didn't get there til maybe 10:15 am. We whipped up the beginnings of the yeast dough.....and Perfectly's dad had his 'list' to make sure the timing of everything was just right. IT'S A THANKSGIVING MEAL PEOPLE! Of COURSE it isn't going to come out all on time....just right. It's a Holiday RULE........unless you are Martha Stewart or something.

So, what were the highlights? Hmmmm.......there are so MANY.

Rolls were not that fabulous.

Mother-in-law drank probably 3 glasses of wine BEFORE dinner....and had nothing else to eat in the day.

Stuffing was far to peppery (Perfectly's dad's fault)

Ham was okay, but not fabulous. We bought a different brand. Lesson Learned.

It was pointed out to the entire table that I was the ONLY one who voted for OBAMA. (how do they know? huh? for real...)

Father in law was griping about 'where are all the CHANGES he promised'? WTF? HE ISN'T EVEN IN OFFICE YET.....DUHHHHH......AND HE'S BEEN ELECTED FOR ALL OF WHAT.....3 WEEKS?

Son #1's girlfriend ended up having a stomach virus and throwing up in Mr. P's car on the way home (poor kid...I feel bad for her...and son #1.....)

Father-in-law pulled his gun out at the dinner show it off. We had quite the discussion of the guns they own and how both he and she have conceal and carry permits. Hey Teenie and her son #2...WELCOME TO THE FAM! See the guns?

Mother in law was flushed and drowsy at dinner. Go figure. Let's hope SHE wasn't packing.

GOOD TIMES!!!! I bet you ALL want to come to the next event! I'll get with you with times and dates. See you THEN!!

Friday, November 21, 2008

Wasting away FOR Margaritaville

It's Friday FAVORITE night......and what am I doing? Sitting at the computer, blogging, having my dogs stare at me.

I am really WISHING that you all LIVED here so we could go out for Margaritas. The JUMBO one for $6.95 (that's 26 oz of Margarita fun). Teenie is a. busy b. ignoring me or c. doesnt' have her phone plugged in/on/with her. I'm guessing busy, but fearful she's ignoring my stalkerish 3 calls in an hour. I stalk then fret. Stalk then worry. Sorry MelissaLion and Crissy--I don't fit the sociopathic stereotype of stalkers that don't care about their stalkeree's feelings. I do care, I just can't always help myself.

Hey....that reminds me. For those of you whom I'm already stalking (MelissaLion and Crissy) and for those that may want me to stalk you (anyone? Anyone? Bueller?), I NEED YOUR CONTACT INFO!! That's all existing phone numbers (home, work, cell, spouse/sig. other, etc), addresses and all e-mail addresses. HOW CAN I CALL YOU 3X IN ONE HOUR TO SEE IF YOU WANT VIRTUAL MARGARITAS unless I know how to contact you all!!????

Oh, and DAISEE---YOU CAME BACK!!! I got your comments yesterday, but due to stressful work and home circumstances, I didn't really respond. I took an anti-anxiety pill and went to bed at 8:30 pm.

I was WORRIED that maybe I wasn't WORTHY of being stalked by one so cute and fun!!! But you came back...I was SO happy.

And Stoogie. I am worried. I'm worried that you tire of me, since all the OTHER blogger girls talk about sex toys and their va-jay-jays....and all I ever reference is my boobs. COME BACK TO ME, STOOGIE!! come back.

Mr. Perfectly is out and about to Blue Springs today. Our high school football team is IN THE SEMI-FINALS!!! Can you say WOOOOTTTTT?? Son #2 is a freshman, but he's dressing out and will be on the sidelines with the rest of the team. He won't play, but if we win....we'll go on to the championships in St. Louis the week of Turkey Day. He'll get to go and dress out for that too. If we make it. Keep your fingers crossed and talk to the Football gods......

Okay, back to me. Today is Heather's birthday, and SHE'S going to have a big ole margarita with me. Or maybe I should say I'm going with her for a celebratory birthday dinner (and a JUMBO Margarita!!!).

I hate not having a huge pool of stalkeree's to choose from when my BFF's aren't available. It sucks. I wish I was like Jakki and had people waiting in LINE to be in her presence. I worry that people dont' like me and I dont' know...I just get weird.

I AM however, planning on taking the camera to record some of my beautiful niece's 23rd birthday AND MY JUMBO MARGARITA. And if Perfectly's dad comes, maybe him too. (he's Heather's grandpa!!)

Oh, and I'm just kidding about the wasting away stuff. I've got alot of poundage to go before one could say I'm even CLOSE to wasting away. It just made a fun blog title. It's all about you, internet......I try to please.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

It's official....I'm old

Why am I old? here are a few reasons:

1. I'm going to bed earlier and earlier
2. I hear my mother's voice when I speak
3. I wear nightgowns. Not cute sassy PJ's but a NIGHTGOWN. From JCPenney, no less. To top it off, I've been known, of late, to come home and immediately put the nightgown on......and stay in it all evening.
4. Cleaning out 2 cabinets made me happy
5. I'm looking FORWARD to cooking and stuff for Thanksgiving!
6. I bemoan the youth of today.

Maybe it's the time change, and it's dark early. I dont' know, but I'm not liking it.

Send some Geritol and incontinence pads my way for Christmas. Looks like I'll be needing them.

Monday, November 17, 2008

I must have a problem

Today son #2 had to have an MRI on his knee. Currently he's in one of those long braces....from thigh to calf? They think there may be a bone chip or something behind his knee cap.

So, after running around with him, I stayed home. I managed to get quite a bit accomplished. I have a small house. I don't mind my's comfortable for us. 3 bedrooms. 1 and a half baths......but the kitchen is the tiniest I've ever seen in a house. I mean I know there are hardly kitchens in alot of large city apartments and condos but this is a HOUSE. A whole HOUSE. And my kitchen is smaller than many BATHROOMS.

Anyway, we have a baker's rack along an empty wall---it is filled with STUFF. A coffee maker, extra, pretty plates, and the lower shelves have all my pots and pans. The very top shelf holds my canisters and the base for my phone. I have coffee cups hung on hooks all around it. The coffee mugs are dusty and rarely get washed, let alone used. My father in law bought me a set of stainless steel cookware. Some with NO nonstick on it. We are overflowing on the baker's rack. Mr. Perfectly cusses at LEAST once a day, if not more, over the overflow of crap that I sit on the floor hoping SOMEONE will DO something with it.

So, this morning, before the MRI, while in my jammies, I got busy. I cleaned out a cabinet (that we added in said tiny kitchen) I cleaned out cereal that wasn't getting eaten, crackers that have been LONG forgotten and replaced many times over.....with the replacements being long forgotten....I took some misc. stuff downstairs to store (with all the other crap we don't know what to do with), and I put all my liquor on a shelf in the cabinet, and moved some small appliances and big pots into the cabinet, freeing up alot of space on the bottom shelf of the bakers rack.......

We put all of our soda (or pop) and juice and other drinks ON THE FLOOR in FRONT of the bakers rack....which makes me trip, and I cuss at least once a day over the 12 packs of soda laying around. It's terrible. REALLY terrible.

Anyway, I moved some stuff around, made the bottom shelf of the rack for the soda and drinks, and hopefully will appease my wonderful husband. In the meantime, I found 4 brand new sets of gladware (or the other brands.......same stuff tho). Plastic containers with plastic lids. We lose lids. ALL THE TIME. So, trying to be helpful, I buy MORE containers AND lids but we never seem to throw the lid-less containers away....this upsets Mr. Perfectly alot too.

When I went to store our bazillion piece cookie cutter set (WTF? I don't make cookies) and a couple of other various items.....I found....YOU GUESSED IT...another two sets of plastic.

WHOOPSIE!! I apparently have a problem. No wonder Mr. Perfectly gets all bent out of shape.

So, I guess my next task is to match up lids with containers and pitch the lid-less ones.

Oh, and son #2 failed to take the trash out on Thursday, so our barrel is totally full and I have an extra 3 full bags of kitchen trash. Now I guess I'll add some plastic trash.

I don't think of us as pack rats. We get rid of LOTS of stuff on a regular basis. We, in fact, are the trashiest people I know!!! We don't always have full barrels, but we put our trash out twice a week, and MANY times the big rolling trash cart is overflowing. How can this be? It's nuts. No........(hangs head) we don't recycle. Mr. Perfectly told me if I wanted to recycle, it would be all my job. He said I'd have to wash out all cans, bottles and whatever else was recycled to prevent bugs.......and he wasn't doing ANY of, it's not getting done. I'm not patient or dedicated enough to recycle. I know, I'm a bad, bad person.

I tried to learn how to get the pictures from the photo memory card to the computer. I apparently am the dumbest person on earth, because I couldn't do it by myself or with help from Mr. Perfectly. I am such an idiot at times.

I took pictures of my messy kitchen/baker's rack, and I have some of Buster at the vet this past Saturday---all muzzled like Hannibal Lecter again......poor baby. He got x-rays........nothing appears to be wrong, and he is hobbling around on 3 legs for no apparent reason.

Alas, the photos will have to wait.'s a final thought. Ruby.

I have often posted on how I wish I had lots of friends, and how I'm afraid of being judged on my weight, blah blah blah. Right?

I found a 'reality show' on they Style Network called Ruby. She's a very overweight woman on a mission to lose weight. For all the right reasons. HERSELF, mainly. She's absolutely lovely. I fell in love with her on her first show. She's outgoing, kind and seems to be such a fabulous person!!! She has a huge support system, and lots of friends, and the girl seems to have most of her shit together.

If you have a sec, look it up on the internet, or watch her show. You'll fall for her too!! I imagine my internets as people like Ruby's friends. Y'all love me for me......(I hope).....and Stoogie loves me for my boobs. haha...just joking Stoogie.

I'm off for now.......gotta cook din for the fam.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008



I'm applying for the job of Crissy's Stalker---as she requested. I posted some job qualifications on her blog, but it's RUDE to take up THAT much space in someone's comments, so I thought I'd put my resume/qualifications on MY blog so she can make an informed decision.

Oh, I am quite flexible, so if by happenstance, you need a stalker in YOUR life, then give me a jingle......I'm sure I can fit more than one stalkeree in my life.

I am uniquely qualified to be your stalker, as I do this on a regular basis and have done so all my life. I am not a creepy stalker, or a stalker wanting to see you NEKKID, but one who only wants to have as MANY BFF's in her life as possible.

I am also qualified to be a Princess Stalker, as some of my attributes will show...I can be as Entitled and Princess-ish as the next stalker.

Like when I was a kid and ran after people to walk to school with me that I thought left me behind!

Like my ability to call your home, work and cell phones and send a text in mere SECONDS hoping to catch up with you do stuff, or to chat!

Like when I was in high school, and I drove by my then boyfriend's car a millionty times while he was out of town to just 'see' the car......

Like when I get my feelings hurt when you have plans with your FAMILY instead of me.

Like not needing speed-dial on old fashioned phones since my fingers can dial and redial numbers lightning fast!

My uncanny ability to remember phone numbers in general.

My uncanny ability to remember things you tell me, no matter how insignificant.

My uncanny ability to have hours long phone conversations about such riviting topics as Dogs and Teenagers.

My use of google to find shit out.

Like how I KNOW I shouldn't call back within 10 minutes after calling all your known numbers and texting you, but I do anyway, JUST IN CASE you may not have gotten my messages or noticed your missed calls.

Like my desire to just email you to see what you are doing....and have you respond.

and the biggest of all? I stalk MYSELF looking for return e-mails, and comments to my blog. I check my own e-mail like WAAAYYYY too often to see if you've communicated with me in some see if my posts were witty and made you laugh, or if you think I'm insightful and intelligent!

Yes, I know. My mad skillz are enough to make the tens of you that read my blog RACING to have me be your own stalker. You all will be vying to be first in my e-mails and comments.

MelissaLion? I know you are just DYING to have me stalk YOU too........

I know it's amazing that a busy Wife, Mom and employee would have the TIME to acquire such an impressive list of stalker skills, but I multi task well, and have learned how to accomplish much while doing other tasks. Like checking my e-mail and Sitemeter!!

I'll be awaiting your applications!! I can't WAIT to see the traffic this awesome post brings to my site!!

Toodles for now!!

I appreciate your consideration

Oh, my references? I'll provide them upon request. They will be from Teenie, Jakki and Ph.D!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Beans Beans, the musical fruit!!

Are you all sick of my food craze this week? Huh? Huh? I know, but it's sort of a blah week, and nothing exciting is happening, and I'm COOKING!!!! Please meet my sous-chef, Mr. Perfectly!! He's chopping my jalapeno peppers for me. Isn't that nice??

Today, I'm making Ham-n-beans, or ham and bean soup......depends on what you want to call it. We probably make a soup version, as it is....well....SOUPY!! Not thick and stew-ish (if ham-n-beans can be stewish). I also make a Tex-Mex corn bread.....I used to think I didn't like it.....because overall I'm not a corn bread fan at all. Just not a corn fan in general, I guess. But over the years, I've decided that this Tex-mex corn bread is really awesome. REALLY awesome!

Oh, we also bought whole chicken's on sale today and are roasting them. For what? I don't know. We use chicken meat for ALOT of we can always use cooked chicken around for those quick meals, or for some of our barbeque chicken nachos!! My in laws gave us a crock pot bbq pit--they didn't enjoy it, and thought we might. We cooked the ham in it the other night and are now trying roast chicken out.

Anyway, we decided to roast these chickens to have on hand.....I buy alot of rotisserie chickens, and they are good!! It's just nice to have stuff on hand.....

So, on with the recipe fest!!


1 lg onion diced
4 ribs celery finely sliced or chopped
4 carrots, finely sliced or chopped
1 smoked ham bone, when carving, plan ahead and leave some meat on the bone!! (no ham bone? buy smoked pork shanks or hocks to flavor broth, then use a small ham steak to add some shredded meat)
2 quarts chicken broth/stock
1 lbs great northern beans or navy beans soaked overnight (or use quick soak method on package)
oil for saute

Saute your chopped veggies in oil til tender. Add broth and bones---simmer for an hour or so. Add beans and cook for an additional couple of hours....viola!! Ham and bean soup!! You may want to take out the big bone and/or hock pieces for serving.

Tex-Mex cornbread

1 beaten egg
1 c yellow self rising corn meal mix (you can use white too)
1 8 oz can creamed corn (I use full can and double recipe)
1/2 c milk
2T melted shortning or oil (I use oil)
1 T sugar (Personally, I omit...I hate sweet cornbread)
4 oz (one cup) shredded sharp cheddar cheese
2T finely chopped jalapeno peppers or other spicy green chili

mix all ingredients and put into a greased 8 in square pan, and bake at 450 degrees for 25 to 30 minutes.

Now tell me.......isn't this just an awesome fall day meal? Yummy!!

Okay, now for the weirdness of my family. You can use a small amount of prepared (or other kinds you like)mustard in your beans for additonal flavor. Mr. Perfectly and Perfectly's dad swear by this.........Me? I don't eat it like that.

toodles for now, kids!!

Monday, November 10, 2008


I consider myself to be a pretty good cook. I use shortcuts, and convenience items at times, but seriously? I prefer homemade.

Except for broths and stocks. I use pre-made stocks and broths for EVERYTHING…..and they are quite good in my humble, home cook opinion. So, for those of you that are chef-ey types, don’t criticize me for my shortcut techniques……

I made my stuffing last night for dinner. Man, was it a carb fest dinner!! A little ham, very little potato (don’t want to overdo on the carbs, now), a serving of rice and a HUGE PLATEFUL of stuffing doused with gravy. The boys wanted CORN of all things…so much for my green veggie…I skipped the corn. Not a huge fan.

I’m a stuffing snob. I like plain old stuffing. No fruit, no organs, no nuts… fancy breads……even cornbread is out in my book. Here is my recipe for plain old fashioned stuffing.

(NOTE: All amounts are guesses….it depends on how much bread one uses……)

3-4 ribs of celery sliced
1 huge onion, diced
1 to 1 and a half sticks of BUTTER (not margarine)
A lot of stale bread ( I used approximately 8 torn up sandwich rolls—toast the bread in the oven if you don’t have the time to let it get hard and stale on it’s own)
1 qt chicken stock or broth
3T poultry seasoning
Salt/pepper to taste

Sauté the celery and onion in the butter til veggies are soft.

Add the chicken broth, salt, pepper and poultry seasoning to the veggies. Let it simmer a few minutes.

Put the toasted bread in a huge bowl, and slowly pour (in several batches is my suggestion) the broth and veggies over the bread. Stir frequently between liquid adding……add enough broth til the bread is equally coated (damp) with the broth. Some pieces WILL get saturated---that’s what happens when dry bread has liquid poured on it, but try to avoid COMPLETELY soggy bread.

Add a beaten egg for stabilization if you want to….I didn’t this time.

Pour mixture into a greased pan (9x13 for what I made) and bake until set and the top is crunchy.

Use your favorite gravy and EAT UP.

Oh, something else I am not fond of? Stuffing inside a bird, or other types of meat. I like my stuffing crunchy on the edges…..not soft and soggy from inside a bird. Besides, I’m poultry paranoid and despite all the proper cooking techniques, I’d rather not stuff up a bird. It sort of grosses me out.

Anyway, we had a spiral ham (pretty hard to stuff that)….and I threw the carb fest in for the rest of the dinner. Yum.

A funny story about stuffing making in my family: My grandma and Great Aunt Jessie would begin saving bread heels and misc. bread for what seemed like a REALLY long time before Thanksgiving and Christmas. They’d toss it into a paper bag in their kitchen and let it sit and dry out. I assume they’d shake the bag up occasionally to allow all bread to get stale instead of moldy……

Anyway, my Great Uncle A.J. one day, came into the kitchen prior to the feast making began and carefully cleaned the stray hair from his comb and threw it into the ‘trash’. Unknowingly, he tossed the clump of hair into the BREAD sack…….I don’t remember the ending of that story….if they picked the hair out (knowing Grandma and Jessie, they probably did), or just bemoaned the loss of the long saved stale bread.

I’m also going to give you all my family’s famous (or infamous) rice casserole recipe too. It’s been in my Paternal family for years. My Maternal family adopted it too, and we never have a holiday or special meal without it.

It sounds simple and unusual (plain)…but don’t knock it……it’s REALLY good.

2 cans of consommé (soup aisle). NOT BEEF BROTH
1 cup long cook rice (no minute rice here, folks)
1 small can of mushrooms (drained)
1/3 stick of butter.

Put all ingredients into a casserole dish (2 qt??) with a tight lid. Bake at 350 for one hour, or a little longer (until liquid is absorbed into the rice). It goes well with all types of meat---turkey, ham, roast beef.

It sounds all homey and soup-ish, but it is actually quite good, and quite easy. Kids LOVE it……..

Well, that’s all the cooking tips I have today. In exchange for my Holiday recipes, please PLEASE, tell me how to make good gravy. I cheated and used a bottled brown gravy last night---which isn’t too bad, but seriously? Using the drippings from meat to make gravy kind of grosses me out, too……… Grandma Winnie made the best gravy EVER….and I know she used drippings, but I didn’t have to see it. I just ate the final result. Anyway, I need good gravy recipes. I suck at gravy making.


Sunday, November 9, 2008

Sam's Club

What variety and how little can a person get for 143.58 at Sam's Club?

2 Fountain Drinks
1 Set of 3 umbrellas
1 bottle of Pre-made Margaritas
1 set of extra large shopping bags
1 spiral cut ham
1 box of potstickers
1 huge bottle of olive oil
1 bottle of wine
1 package of underwear
1 salt grinder
1 pepper grider
1 box of cookies
1 huge (HUGE) bottle of pre-minced garlic
2 lbs pecans
and a bag of pretzel crisps.

I love/hate Sam's club....... I love all their stuff that they have and I hate how much I spend when I go. I love their samples of foods, and hate that I can't buy it all (except for the 'boneless' buffalo wings....yuk)

The shopping bags we bought? They were $2.74 for a set of two, and these are the biggest re-usable shopping bags I've ever seen. It held all of our Sam's club stuff and almost all of our groceries that we bought at Schnucks. Seriously. They are huge.

WE are having ham for dinner. And mashed potatoes and stuffing. Oh, and a rice dish. We're also having some sort of green vegtable to compliment all of the CARBS we will be taking in this evening.

Then on Tuesday (Veterans day!! A day off--woo hoo!!) we'll have Ham-n-Bean soup (with the leftover ham/hambone). Yummy!!

I'm off for now. Gotta start drinking the gallon of Margaritas we bought and making homemade stuffing (or dressing for the sophisticated folk).

Stoogie, as much as I love my own homemade stuffing, I still wish I was in Puerto Rico, on a beach drinking fruity drinks with umbrellas in them.


Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Garage to make an ass of one's self.

So, I call the po-po because my nice neighbor's garage door was open all day. I could have gone and pushed the button, but was afraid of entering someone's property. When I left for work this morning, it was safely shut.

Mr. Perfectly and I pigged out on a Chinese Buffet lunch, and I came home do some stuff. And the fact it's 75, sunny in NOVEMBER made me spring feverish. But thats beside the point.

I got home after stuffing my face with MSG and green find my neighbor happily waving hello from his yardwork (which I NEVER do). I stepped over to talk to him and told him about the garage door. I told him how I didn't want to meddle in people's bidness.....and that I was sorry if the call caused him any issues. He seemed surprised, and we exchanged numbers in case something like that would happen we chitchatted, and I told him REPEATEDLY that I am not a nosy neighbor we got on the topic of our VERY nosy old man neighbor. is the norm I couldn't keep my mouth from running.

I didn't say anything bad, really...just that the old guy gets annoying and I dont' like it when he corners my kids and gripes to them about life in general. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH. Oh, I certainly don't want to be be thought of as nosy.....blah blah blah.

I think the guy thought I was a nut job. And too late!! HE'D ALREADY GIVEN ME HIS NUMBER. whoopsie!!

I asked him personal questions....well, not like PERSONAL PERSONAL, but stuff like "are you going to move in or are you just flipping the place?" it's any of my business!!!! What I was trying to find out is in the future, if there are house issues again, will he even be AROUND......not that I care if he lives there or not.

Hopefully he could see my earnest face, and knew I was just making nervous chatter. Crap. Another possible friend down the tubes.

So, now I'll have to be on my best behavior and not run outside in my nightshirt after the dogs, or scream at the television with the windows open, or yell at my kids from a few feet away to STOP TEXTING ME FROM THE SAME DAMN HOUSE........I'll have to live a proper, quiet life for a while in hopes that the poor dude doesn't think he's next door to the 'REAL' nosy neighbor.

The odd thing is that after our dialogue of the nosy old man, he mentioned that the guy had already been up there telling him about the garage door!! WTF?? He acted all surprised and whatnot when I was telling my story..........maybe he was just being polite and didn't want me to know that Nosy man had been up there probably talking about ME? I don't always makes me suspicious when people that already know something, don't just come right out and say so.......they have a whole conversation with you...about something they already knew. It's weird.

But I have to say as I was turning into my cracked up driveway, I did sing "nah nah nah nah nah' to the McCain/Palin signs still in peoples yards. Not this guy's yard, mind you...I'd have left his door UP for that infraction........hahahahaha...just joking.....sort of.

So, Mr. Neighbor........I'm sorry for coming across as a whacko crackpot with a never ending spew of words coming forth from my pie hole. I promise, I really am nice, and I do try to be cute and PULLEEEZZEE give me another chance and dont' change your phone numbers!!!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008


I ran late this morning, so I had to go after work. I made it to my polling place at about 3:45 pm, and I was voter # 1096 at that location. Is this good? Is it a higher turnout? Mr. Perfectly was on time, and went before 7 am this morning and was in the 160's.

Work was tough today. I don't discuss politics at work. Except with Jakki. As it turns out we lean the same direction, but with her (as it should be with a BFF), I'm allowed to have my OWN opinion without ruffling her feathers. We whisper our thoughts, because we work for a Republican administration, and regardless, it just isn't good to try to talk with every one because not everyone is open to others having a differing or contradicting opinion. Working for State Government and talking politics just doesn't make for good bed fellows. Even if the party I agree with is in office (which it isn't currently).

The ignorance seemed to be running rampant today. I heard MORE THAN ONCE today that Sarah Palin is 'really skinny' and that her thighs 'are about THIS big (makes circle with fingers)'. As if thigh size makes for a good do you TELL people that appearance isn't what matters? It was distressing.

There were lots of proud 'I VOTED' stickers being displayed, and lots of bemoaning the lack of ability to vote a straight party ticket. **sigh* Also lots of discussion about how different people would be ABLE to mark those republican canididates with no problem.

Oh well, enough kvetching. I am PROUD to live in a country where people are ALLOWED to have an opinion, and ALLOWED to have a choice. That should be the resounding sound....not bitching over people's failure to pay attention.

Our neighbor seems to have left his garage door open. Wide open. He just moved in maybe 6 weeks ago, and although he's quite nice, I don't know his name. He also doesn't seem to stay there often....I don't know if he travels alot or if he is just flipping the house. I am not one to get all up into people's kool aid without knowing the flavor (just for you, Jak), so I was in a connundrum as to what to do.

I finally called the police....told them that they guy didn't appear to be home, that his garage was wide open, and what does one do? The lady on the phone just said she'd send someone out. I mean, it has an opener, I COULD go shut it, but what if he wants it open and I've invaded his space? It's just sort of weird.......and I'm reminded of the CB's of the 70's......will some electronic device raise a garage door? Maybe he DID shut it!!

I will be on pins and needles tonight, Internet. The DEMS MUST pull this one out.......

Toodles for now.

Monday, November 3, 2008


I had a really scary dream. My Ghost Hunters obsession sometimes makes me wonder if I am inviting spirits into my life, you know? I really don’t believe in that stuff, but still, sometimes I wonder.

Like the time I’d watched Ghost Hunters and I dreamed that my BFF Teenie and one of the gay guys from one of the Big Brother shows were demons in my car baring their teeth at me. I stopped Ghost Hunters COLD TURKEY for several weeks after that crazy dream.

Well, yesterday, I watched the last half of Paranormal State. I don’t enjoy this show. There’s a lot of religion, cross kissing, and refusal to mention some name of some demon for fear we’ll all have it invade us…….but I was bored, and the title of the show sounded interesting, and I was tired of watching years old re-runs of Cold Case files. I turned it and it was some 26 year old girl that was (sigh) possessed and needed an exorcism (or deliverance, as the Paranormal State people called it). There was a Priest, and again, lots of cross kissing, and holy water and demon removal. It was all a bit silly, and I caught myself rolling my eyes at the tee-vee---even though I was all by myself at my house.

Well, people, the time change screws with my brain, so I went to bed at 8 pm (even though it was really 9 pm before daylight savings time ended). I was embarrassed by going to bed so early, so I turned on Iron Chef in the bedroom, and promptly fell asleep….before I could see what fascinating things they did with ham.

Well, let me tell you what. I dreamed I was DEAD and trying to get into peoples bodies so I could LIVE still. I was so scared of being dead and of taking people over and what not, that I woke up with a START to hear Mr. Perfectly coming down the hall. I figured he was turning off lights to come to bed, but as I called out to him to tell him I was terrified by this dream that I couldn’t really remember or understand he was by the bed asking if I was okay……apparently I’d been screaming in my sleep. He was coming to CHECK ON ME (isn’t he sweet). People, I’ve talked in my sleep, and even WALKED in my sleep, but I don’t think I’d ever screamed out loud in my sleep.

So, do I give up drunken Ghost Hunters Wednesdays? Or was it a stupid fluke…or was it the demons coming to get me for rolling my eyes at them during Paranormal State?

Oh, another thing that may have contributed to my nocturnal screaming? Yeah….Sarah Palin is coming to my city. Today. At noon. She’ll be a block (or less) away from my office. NOW, THAT IS WHAT I CALL SCARY, PEOPLE!!! Mr. Perfectly is there right now…..4 and a half hours early to get photos. I guess Hank Williams, Jr. is slated to perform too. **sigh**

Mr. P loves the campaign trail when all the candidates come to our city (or close to it). He loves the photo ops. He visited Joe Biden in Columbia, Mo shortly after he was chosen as the Democratic VP pick…..he made quite the embarrassing gaffe (Biden, not Mr. P). Apparently, as he was enthusiastically introducing prominent Democratic political figures at the beginning of his speech (duh, we live in the Capital of Missouri….there’s lots of political types to be had around here), Biden was calling out his Democratic ‘buddies’ and asking each of them to stand, when he called on one well known local politician…..he yelled “come on *&$@! STAND UP!!”…Well, this particular senator is confined to a wheelchair. WHOOPSIE!! Despite my political preferences, I must say that this embarrassed me….come on folks…..get with the PROGRAM and at least have your aides give you the rundown on the local important people!!

But anyway, I really have been stressed at her visit today. She’s not exactly my kind of gal (sorry…I try to be PC, because I am a state Government employee), but I’d really prefer not to have the town all in an uproar over this. Sigh.

Let’s just vote and get on with it and let her leave the spotlight for GOOD is what I say. (shhhhh..I’m not supposed to voice an opinon publicly!!)

I fixed my hair differently today…..I left it curly (as usual), but straightened my bangs and pushed them over to the left (see, even my BANGS get it right)………I’m trying so hard to get away from my 80’s curled ‘roll’ of bangs on my forehead. I have no talent at all in hair styling, so I never know what to do. I bought a flat iron over the weekend and am experimenting.

Well, I need to stop blogging and start working……’s kind of the rule when one is employed, you know?

See you all later!!!

Saturday, November 1, 2008


I've never had jello shots. I'm too old to have been part of the 'club scene'...back in my bar days, beer was about all people drank. Except me. I don't like beer.

I've never had anyone slurp anything out of my belly button.......and I've never danced on top of a bar/table/or any other off the ground object. I've also never rolled around in a pool of jello.

Teenie and I made probably 125 to 150 jello shots last night. There would have been more, but apparently my inexperience with the whole jello shot thing made me fill some of the cups too full. We made the following combinations:

Melon Jello/Watermelon Rum
Melon Jello/Midori
Lemon Jello/plain vodka
Pineapple jello/2/3 plain vodka & 1/3 blue curaco
Tropical punch jello/plain vodka
orange jello/peach schnapps

I sipped each concoction while still hot and my favorite was the pineapple. Believe it or not, my second favorite (which I would NEVER have guessed) was the punch. I'm not much of a red jello/kool aid type of person. Strawberry is OKAY, but not great. Cherry----mmmmm, not so much. My third favorite was the lemon jello with the vodka and curaco. I expected the orange/peach and the melons to be my favorites. I was surprised. I'm anxious to try them when they've set and are cold.

I read on the internet that even experienced drinkers (ahem......not me) even have trouble with jello shots because one doesn't know how much liquor is ingested since it is yummy and jello-ish. WE are also bringing wine.

OHHHHHH!!!! What did we make jello shots FOR? We are going to a BYOB school fundraiser for Teenie's son---a project graduation TRIVIA NIGHT. Teenie's sister, Marie, is coming down and either Mr. Perfectly OR Perfectly's dad will be joining us. This is a big deal since neither of the influential males in my life are social butterflies. They were supposed to BOTH come, but due to a miscalculation on table space, only one will join us. I don't care who, as long as there is a sober person to take me home.

Teenie was responsible originally for selling 20 slots---THAT'S ALOT OF PEOPLE....but her ex husband took over selling one table of 10 and Teenie sold one table of 10, so there will be 20 of us at two tables vying for a trivia WIN.

I love Teenie's sister, too. It's always a BLAST when we are all together. I'm so excited!!

Well, I'm off to find an inflatable monkey and see if Wal Mart has any 1/2 price Halloween crap left. Like the hot dog costume for my weiner dog!

Stoogie, I (or Mr. P) will be taking the awesomely cool new camera to the event this evening, so there (hopefully) will be photos to share.

By for now my sticky, jello friends!!