Thursday, May 29, 2008

What I wanted, then didn't.

I went to Cato armed with a pair of much looked for capri leggings. Brown. I envisioned myself looking as cute at the size 8 model did in my tunic/dress/shirt.

I called my BFF Jakki to come with give me HONEST answers. I excitedly went into the dressing room, and pulled out my leggings. The box said they were a large I proceeded to put them on. The box ALSO said 'low rise leggings'. A quite important fact that I didn't understand. I'll get to that in a sec.

I shimmied my way into the coveted brown leggings. I was wearing my standard satiny granny panties...that come up past my belly button. They were blue. I tried to pull these leggings up like panty hose.....and guess what? Low rise means just that....low rise. Low rise against the slick underwear just DIDN'T work But in my ZEAL to look fabulous, I decided I could find other leggings somewhere other than Wal-mart, so I let them fall down UNDER my belly fat roll........and proceeded to put on my VERY CUTE tunic/dress/shirt. I walked with my knees together (so the leggings didn't roll all the way down) to the hanger, and excitedly pulled on the Pièce de résistance.

Teenie and the teenage store clerk were right. Shit. Damn. I looked like an orange tye died kids ball---round in the middle.....and hugging all the WRONG places. My leggings for whatever reason made my legs look even WORSE than they do can that be? They were CONTAINING the icky was BAAAADDD. Jakki was waiting for me in the store, but I didn't want to even leave the dressing room. I called her in, and bless her heart...she tried to put a positive spin on it..........then she finally realized it was useless......there wasn't much that one COULD say......except "yeah, your legs look really big in those". I mentioned that they ARE big...and she said "no, these make it worse". So I gave up. I unrolled the leggings, shoved them into my purse, and happily put on my shapeless sweats, t-shirt and dirty flip flops.

I totally shy away from 'classic'. I think my style could best be described as "HO-Bag". I just seem to gravitate towards things that just aren't meant for me. A 42 yr old MOTHER that is really heavy. I like bright and fun (translation: Loud). I don't like satiny...or everything usually clings in not a GOOD WAY.......

This was NOT a case of self deprecation........It was a 'light bulb' moment that maybe I need some intervention.........

What is cute for the 40 and young at heart crowd?

Thanks for the words of get what makes me happy...what I like and to HELL with the 'rules'. hehehehe.....I better find at least a FEW rules...because if I hadn't tried this on, and ended up wearing it OUT.....or lordie.........I'm glad I had enough sense to try it on.


christina said...

everytime i see my mom she says she's going to submit me to "what not to wear."

i've been into this legging thing, too. i liked it the first time around ... it has to be good, right? compfy ...

ugh. i'm sure they look fantastic on 14 year old girls.

Teresa said...

I feel your pain! I too am a 43 yr old, overweight woman and I live in a small town where Fashion Bug (or Wal-Mart but I refuse to shop there)is the only place to find plus size clothing. The past couple of years have been impossible to find clothes that I feel comfortable and fashionable in.

Buying from the catalogs is impossible because they never use realistic models and the sizes are never quite right.

The best that I can figure is, this is societies way of telling us loose the weight or you will be forced continue to dress like a "HO-Bag".

My Life My Life My Life said...

40 is the new 30, or so they say. You know me, there are certain things I will not wear, age appropriate has never been the excuse. Hmmmm except shorts. I dont think people should wear shorts past the age of 12 but thats just me.

It all boils down to how I look and feel in it. YES, I have prejudiced ideas on what I will wear but in the immortal words of Rudy Huxtable (showing my age) I KNOOOOOOOOOOOW MY BODY..

Kristen said...

Sometimes things don't work out the way we see it in our heads.

That sucks.

I'm sorry about the outfit.

Lynne said...

Leggings are tough. On me they make my legs look significantly shorter and fatter. They just don't work on everyone! Sorry it didn't work out. I'm 46 and I have trouble with clothing because what I SHOULD wear (age-wise) doesn't match how I feel inside. I still feel 22. There aren't many choices for the "young at heart". There's the whore look, or the grandma look. Not much in between. Sadly.