How does a mother explain to her 17 yr. old son that he doesn't have a BIG butt? He has a very high, round, firm butt that is attractive to the opposite sex.
There is SO much wrong with the above for SO many reasons. He thinks his butt is big, when actually is very cute and proportionate to his frame....so when he worries about it I try to give him positive feedback, an it comes out so weird.
Let's break this down: Son complains about his big butt. Being the good mother I am, I attempt to reassure said son that indeed he does NOT have a big butt, but a very nicely proportioned hind end. He looks so cute in his football pants, we can ALWAYS tell which one he is when his number isn't visible because of his cute tush.
This translates somewhere between MOMMY and PEDOPHILE; and those two words should never be used in the same sentence!!