Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Puppy Love

Hi. My name is Buster. I'm approximately 5 years old and I am a prince. I love sitting on my mom's lap, but I try to bite her if she moves me. My favorite place in the world is MY bed. My owners think it's theirs, but it is really mine....alllllll mine. I spread out as much as my 15 lb body will allow. I WILL bite any human, dog or cat that attempts to invade my space. I have everyone bamboozled with my threats, except the dad. He doesn't take my bullshit. I sleep under the covers with my humans. The dad wanted to replace their cozy waterbed with a KING sized bed so he had more room, since I like to stretch out. I hate farts...I find them undignified, and will leave the area if an offending odor invades. Unless it's mine....then I pretend it is THEIR farts....they are just humans. They don't know the difference.

HI...HI....HI...OH HI...CAN YOU SEE ME? HUH? HUH? HUH? I can see you and I want to french you...I want to french EVERYONE......I love tongue kissing......yea I do. I have two speeds.....full speed ahead and off. Nothing in between. If I sit on your lap, I'm sleeping or trying to FRENCH you.......yessiree.....Buster is a bully---but he's a helluva lot of fun to play with....but it's always on HIS terms.....only when he wants to play......I'm gentle, loving and YIPPEE....kinda hyper....I hate the UPS truck and the mailman. They are the bane of my existence. I sit on the back of the couch just WAITING for them to come and I bark my ASS off.....I think the humans really enjoy my protective nature. The harsh barking really makes them feel confident and protected.....Oh, my name is Copper.......can ya tell why? I'll give you THREE guesses...............my COLORING? You guessed right away...how didja guess? Wow...you are smart. You know how Buster finds farts undignified? He doesn't know what he's missing.....it doesn't matter who farts around here....I sniff my own rear......you never know it COULD'VE been me.........oh, and one more thing...I hump blankets when anyone leaves the house. Even if some of my family is still here...in the same room with me. I know, it's a bit humiliating, but I can't HELP it......Oh, and I'm not fat.....some of the mom's friends that have looked at this photo have said I am a fat doggie, but I'm not.....it's just a bad angle.....the mom wanted to show off my Coppery coloring and didn't choose a flattering shot......I'm sort of a Min Pin mix, and what you see is my hindquarter folded up against my belly.........

Um...Yea. As you can clearly see, I'm not a puppy. She would call her post "puppy love". Clearly, I'm a feline. Not a canine. Sheesh. I am Joe Kitty. You can call me Joe. I'm the coolest cat ever. Copper is a pretty cool playmate. I sit up on my hind legs and pretend I'm a GRIZZLY BEAR and swat the crap out of him. I don't have claws, but I'm a GRIZZLY at heart. I eat dog food, and occasionally pee on towels that get left on the floor. Or socks. The baby gate that the dad puts up so the stupid canines won't eat my poop recently got put up incorrectly (yes, the mom did it wrong) and I couldn't get under it. I'm too old, lazy or stupid to JUMP OVER, so we had a bad weekend of peeing on towels and pooping in the bathroom laundry basket. Since the dad found the problem, I've done better. The lady should just get her stuff together and know how to PROPERLY change my litter and to place the gate JUST SO.........huh. I showed them. Since the mom is learning how to put pictures on her blog, this got a little out of hand, don't you think? The dad is a decent photographer, so maybe she'll post more of his photos. He'd probably like that.

1 comment:

monkey said...

OH MY GOSH!! I love Buster!! He looks like my Sadie. Check her out on my blog, Monkeysmomma.com.