Trying to be considerate of others

This is for my latest blog crush--SurvivingMyself. He hates people who talk too much, so for HIS sake, I'll try to be brief--because y'all KNOW that I want people to LIKE me.

Dog growled alot at me today.

Work sucked weenie.

Grocery shopping sucked BIG weenie.
**they did have good sales, though**

Peeling 2 lbs of shrimp sucked REALLY BIG weenie.

Shrimp cooked fast.

Mr. Perfectly came home and assembled Quesadillas. Woo Hoo.

I drank 2 glasses (tumblers) of Riunite Lambrusco, mixed w/ 7up to make it palatable.

Let grounded teenage son off the hook to go watch Soccer.

Mr. Perfectly got mad.

Watched dvr'd episode of American Idol ONLY to see Paula flub.

Am nearly DESPERATE to watch Ghost Hunters.

Want to wait to fast forward thru commercials.

May need more Lambrusco.

Will try to love on my dog again...at my own risk.

Like the people who respond to my comments on their blogs.

Wish I was funnier.

Wish I was richer.

Wish I knew if I should use was or were in above 2 notations.

Tomorrow will go back to my detailed, ... self...

Am tense that I may be forgetting something IMPORTANT in being terse.

Goodnight.

I’ve gone and done it now

Remember me talking about how my dog, Buster, is often snappy? Yeah, well, what I didn’t mention is that sometimes I egg him on. Well, not exactly ‘egg’ him on, I just keep trying to love on him when he doesn’t want to be loved on to PROVE that he won’t snap at me….that I’m his Mama, and he LUVS me, and would NEVER think of biting me. Guess What? He bites. The little sucker bites HARD sometimes too……but never breaks the skin….the worst I’ve gotten is if he catches a knuckle or something, then skin may get scraped, but overall, he just bites, then looks at me like “I’ve been GROWLING trying to TELL you, but would you LISTEN? NOOOO” Then licks me….as if apologizing. Buster gives fair warning that he doesn’t want to be bothered. It’s at it’s worst when he is sleeping…especially on the bed. He growls, and shows his teeth. It’s funny, because when he’s REALLY riled up, he’ll ‘chew’ on those growls….he moves his tongue around while growling and it sounds like he’s chewing it up…..that’s when we leave him alone….because that’s usually the pre-cursor to BITING. Well, biting me. He doesn’t bite Mr. Perfectly. Mr. Perfectly is the alpha dog….and I’m just his bitch, I guess.

Anyway, as is the norm, this morning after my shower, I went and dug Buster out of the piles of covers he burrows under every morning. I started petting him, and he growled. But he also rolled over and showed his belly---all like “oh, alright…if you HAVE to pet me then pet me HERE”. So, I petted his belly, while baby talking to him. He was growling and chewing……which should have been my SIGN to back away from the pup, but no….I stuck my FACE down into his face cooing and talking to him….and guess what? He bit me…on the LIP. Now, this has never happened (except one time after we first got him, and he had a bath—I tried kissing on him, and he didn’t like it). I always stick my face into his, and when he snaps, he always goes for my hands. Even if my face is RIGHT there….so in my quest to feel worthy of him, I was kissing on him while he was growling and showing his teeth, and my upper lip and his teeth became intimately acquainted. Of course, he broke the skin, and I feel like an absolute idiot. Not to mention, the adorable swelling---I can’t say that the Melanie Griffith look is what I’ve been trying for.

Actually, it isn’t that bad—I certainly notice it, but I am not sure if it is all that obvious to others. It’s certainly sore, though. Here’s my fear. What if I need medical treatment for this bitten lip? I think they have to report all animal bites, and what if they quarantine my dog? I mean, no, it’s not acceptable that he’s snappy in this manner, BUT I KNOW he’s snappy, I know the signs and I should have KNOWN better than to try to rub noses with a teeth showing, growling dog. It wasn’t as if he didn’t give me WARNING. I chose to IGNORE the warning. I sort of feel like it’s not his fault (totally)….So, I’m hoping beyond hope that this doesn’t get infected—that the soreness will go away and I can hang my head in embarrassment without medical intervention.

Oh, and on a total side note….I went to Teenie’s this weekend to spend some quality time with her, and her sister, Marie. It was a lot of fun, and we saw Teenie’s son off to his first prom. She cried. We went to Target to get prints of the photos as soon as he left with his adorable date. I’d had a tad too much wine, so opted not to drive—Teenie drove, and I used the big red balls that adorn Super Target’s front door as exercise balls. I leaned back, with my hands clasped behind my head (I saw it on TV….I’ve NEVER used an exercise ball in my LIFE). Yeah—pretty embarrassing.

Also, my son went to Prom this weekend too. I’m debating whether to post photos or not. What do YOU think? Wanna see my handsome son? I’ve got photos of me helping him dress, but my very large neck/double (triple) chin is quite…..well…..BIG, and I hate it. I know I should just be all like “this is me….”, but I don’t want to lose my internet friends……because of my weight…..

Tell me what YOU want to see. Pics of me and handsome son? Handsome son alone or Handsome son and date. Whatever gets the most comments wins. My goal is 5 comments from people other than Jakki. Or Teenie. Or Ph.D. In other words, I’m gunning for 5 ‘stranger friend’ comments.

COMMENT…PUHLLLEEEEZZZZ!!

Vagina Bread

I skipped out on Son #2's track meet due to rain (and the fact I didn't want to stand in it) and opted instead for a 2:00 lunch with Teenie. And let me tell you, as is the norm, it was certainly entertaining.

We went to a local cafe that is relatively new called 'The Daily Grind Cafe'. It's a coffee/wine bar. Yeah....kind of weird, but it seems to work. It's a cute little place that has wireless internet access as well as 3 or 4 computers for patrons to use while having that cup-a-joe.....or wine.........he's got a small, but nice menu, that varies from breakfast items, sandwich-ish stuff, to crab cakes and an AWESOME homemade macaroni and cheese. He's got 3 varieties of Mac-n-Cheese...Teenie and I decided to share an order of crab cakes, and Mac-n-Cheese. We each ordered a glass of Vignoles from a Missouri winery (probably Stone Hill, but I can't be certain), and began the wait for the Mac-n-Cheese, which takes a while.....while we visited, the owner kept coming to talk to us. He was a grungy guy in Pajama bottoms, t-shirt and a Nike baseball hat. He apologized for being 'covered in flour', and proceeded to tell us about his baking---he was making a mushroom/bleu cheese bread, and oatmeal/honey bread and goat cheese/balsamic. What unusual, yet PLEASING combinations!! We got to hear about him making the mushroom bread the day before and patrons going WILD for it, so he thought he'd try out some other varieties to see if they went over. He left, brought us our food---which was QUITE good....the crab cakes were too spicy for my taste, but I'm a spicy wuss, so I'm not a good judge....they TASTED awesome, though....we did ask for water as it may have been inappropriate to GUZZLE the wine to ease the spice....and the Mac-n-Cheese? Holy Crap was it good. His menu title for it was "not your mama's mac-n-cheese" and let me tell you...there was no orange powder here......it was creamy, and with a mild garlic flavor----the cheese blend was awesome.....very TRENDY for our neck of the woods where people were raised on the 'BLUE BOX'

He kept visiting with us, especially about the bread. He mentioned that we could have a sample, and we were all like "okay...cool...we LOVE bread" not knowing that he hadn't even put it in the OVEN yet......he told us that he braids it, and makes the top thicker and the bottom narrower....he said he'd ordered some Cabernet powder made from the skins of Cabernet grapes, and was going to try THAT in bread when it came in.....well.....that sounded pretty awesome to us, and we expressed our interest in that idea, and he went so far as to say his FIRST Cabernet powder project was going to be (hold your hats, folks) a Cabernet Chocolate muffin...............I'll let it sink in a sec....a CABERNET CHOCOLATE MUFFIN.......can we hear a collective 'Hell Yeah'? We joked with him telling him at Teenie's birthday in May, we'd be in with the girls to start our day with THAT muffin and some wine....he tootled off to the kitchen after taking the order of another late day patron, needing to web surf......and as we were nearly done with our AWESOME Mac-n-Cheese, he came with the news that the bread was in the oven. Huh?? It's like 3:00 by now......how the heck long does it take bread to BAKE? At my house it takes those frozen things at least 15 -20 minutes and they are already COOKED........so we try to slowly finish our lunch.

Some time later, (but not as long as I thought it SHOULD have taken), I saw him pulling something brown from the oven.......BREAD....WOO HOO......I nod my head towards the kitchen and mumble to Tina "he's taking the bread out" and she's all like..."really? Already?" So we happily awaited our taste. He comes out and chats with the other patron about how fresh and tender the greens for her salad are, and they talk gardening, and stuff...as we sit there, no check, and more importantly, NO BREAD samples. He comes by to offer us another glass of wine, which we decline, since it is, after all, only mid-afternoon.

He leaves us and promptly comes back with a cooling rack, a hot pad and BREAD. He PROUDLY shows off his braided wonder.......which is long, thick at the top, and narrower at the end. Teenie promptly pipes up "It looks a little phallic". He laughed, and said that yes, he could see that and he'd cut some after it 'firmed up'...then he got embarrassed and we, of course, were giggling.......so he tried to backpedal, but it was too late....the words couldn't be taken back. He took the bread back to cool and showed us some little dishes that were shaped like beans....he said something about soup bowls, and explained that he'd ordered some just like it only BIGGER. Teenie told him "good, otherwise, that would be a SMALL bowl of soup'..and we continued to laugh...sort of...wondering where our check was and if we REALLY were going to taste the bread. He leaves with the bean bowl, and returns with two samples of his hot, oatmeal/honey bread. It looked BEAUTIFUL...with swirls in it....it was very salty. Hmmmm...we were expecting sweet......ahhhh, there's the sweet at the end. The salt was a little much, but there were spices and honey rolled all in it..I personally thought it was quite good....Teenie very honestly told Mr. Pajama bottom that she thought the bread was too salty and it reminded her of a pretzel. He seemed a little down about the fact that she didn't LOVE the bread. He told us again about the mushroom/bleu cheese bread and how he was deglazing balsamic vinegar at that moment to make the goat cheese/balsamic bread.

Teenie pipes up..."are you going to make it into the shape of a VAGINA??" The salad eating, web surfing patron nearly pulled a muscle turning her head to look at us........I nearly died. Here's this poor man HAPPILY discussing his food and bread, and he's reduced to Penises and Vagina's. Luckily, he took it all in stride, and told us off color stories about former kitchen help.

I'm ready to go back for dessert!! Not so sure he's ready for us, though.

Musings de jour

I settled last night. The tasty leftover wine from the St. James winery was a bust...I couldn't get the plastic stopper out.....it wasn't a cork...it was a stopper..like in champagne bottles, only this is sparkling blush--for $8.98 a bottle. My 14 yr old SON even tried to pop it open for his ole' mom, but to no avail. I had to drink gin, diet 7up and White CranStrawberry as a fakeout cosmo. I also ate Trix cereal for dinner.

WhiskeyMarie GOT it.....yeah!! I post these silly things on others sites ......and I often wonder (worry) if other people 'get' me. WHOOO HOOOO.....she did! I hope--maybe she just likes ass.

I buy all this stuff for my kids--sports drinks, peanuts, pretzels and granola bars for snacks and quick energy---and they leave them around the house with one drink out of a bottle, or with the peanut jar wide open for DOGGIE faces to feed on....then have the nerve to complain NEXT time when I don't buy the stuff for them to waste.

I'm fervently awaiting Big Brother tonight...I've been heavily trolling the spoiler websites and have tried to eek ANY info that I can from them.........but it's still nearly 3 hours away.....oh...a new GHOST HUNTERS tonight as well.......maybe Mr. Perfectly will get home from his crazy work early enough to manhandle that Sparkling Blush bottle for me.........he may not, though....ghosts and wine may cause him to be on FORCED lookout duty until I'm in a DEEEPPPP sleep.

I need and want a good edemame recipe....Dooce, can you hear me?

Jakki's cat peed in her tennis shoes. That would SUCK.

I've tossed around the idea in my head (hear the rattling?) about a comment-athon. I want traffic here so badly, and I'm sure others do too.....so maybe if there was a huge comment-athon, we could generate traffic to our own sites as well as sites of others.....hmmmmmm....rattle, rattle, rattle.

Sheila from Big Brother 9 was a Penthouse Playmate from the 80's. I found a site that posted her nude shots. I just don't get it....the nudie pics...I've got what she's got (in larger proportions), and it's not all that interesting. Maybe my animals 'get it'...and thats why they won't leave me ALONE in the bathroom.

Mr. Perfectly just sent me a text saying he'll be late AGAIN tonight. The poor guy...he's been working on a huge project for DAYS. Damn....I guess this means no sparkling wine with my ghosts.

I'm off to read---and watch the weather...it's supposed to storm here tonight and tomorrow. I'm afraid of storms. I keep (and make my kids do the same) a pair of shoes handy when storms are called for. That way, when walking through glass and the rubble of a tornado ravaged house, we will have protection for our feet. I also sleep in my undies..only. My mom mentioned once that I'll be in the middle of our street after a storm in shoes and underpants...maybe appropriate sleep attire should be looked into since Missouri has a long storm season.

Happy Administrative Assistant Day!

To short or not to short and Social Faux Pas...comments most welcomed

What do you think of women wearing shorts? According to Oprah's fashion-in-the-know guests and thanks to shows such as "What Not To Wear", women, regardless of size or shape shouldn't wear shorts. That they aren't stylish or becoming.

Ok, now what do you think about heavy women wearing shorts? Not just the "Oh, I need to loose 20 lbs" set, but truly heavy, obese women (and people) wearing them? And obese is not being used as a slam, but as a true medical term to reference and diagnose weight.

Now, what do you think of when you see truly obese people wearing shorts and tops that are too small? That don't fit well? That show the rolls? I mean distinctly--when heavy it's hard to camouflage it...so I mean terribly ill fitting items? You know who I mean....the stereotypical 'wal-martians'--the ones that look unwashed? That look just---well---gross?

Ok, that leads me to my question...I'm seriously overweight. I wear shorts--and sometimes they may not be very flattering. I don't wear too tight shorts, but I wear the nylon 'swishy' type shorts, denim shorts or khaki shorts (the green or tan variety) I shower daily, and my hair is clean--on weekends I don't always wear makeup (hence the eyelash tinting of a week ago Saturday). I run around town looking like a slob--my swishy shorts and a t-shirt. Flip flops or tennies.....In the winter I wear sweats and t-shirts and tennies....I call it my UNIFORM. Now, to go to work, I wear pants and a shirt (yes, they match) and flat shoes..(I cannot do heels)...to go out, I try to put a semblance of 'cuteness' to my outfit. If you ran into me at the grocery in my 'uniform', would you think I was gross, smelly and out of place?

I often wonder as I watch these 'style' shows....do people in other places really 'dress' like the 'What not to Wear' people? It concerns me on several levels. First, my shorts/sweats and t-shirt are COMFY; Second, they are generally inexpensive; Third, it's hard to find that combo of not slutty, not grungy, not MATRONLY and fitting; and lastly what I wear is COMFY......

I'm intimidated by so called 'style'. I can't afford high dollar brands, and comfort, multi-use and ease of washing are important to me.....Why do the style shows say that we will be JUDGED for the swishy shorts and t-shirts? That we won't garner RESPECT of others looking like a mess? And most importantly, why, if it's 95 degrees and 100% humidity, shouldn't I be cool in shorts? They are my size, and the fit fine...do my thighs offend THAT much?

Another thing about 'style'.....it's kind of, well.....sweaty......I mean, if one is heavy, then one may have the rubbing together of thighs, and breasts......a flirty skirt is NOT what I have in mind to remain cool as a cucumber....how does one combat THAT issue in an effort to be CUTE? I am not opposed to skirts, but for me....well....I prefer dry and leg holes to moist and skirts. Can anyone else relate? Do thinner people have the same issues but are better at hiding it? Is there a SECRET?? If so, PLEASE let me know. Skirts are inexpensive, versatile and CUTE....

My BFF's don't wear shorts, and they are both smaller than me. I feel sort of self-conscious when they relate how they look so 'terrible' in shorts.....UMMMM...Hello....I'm bigger and I'm in shorts....is this a TEST? Is it a gentle reminder? I just don't know how to manage my comfort, and being cute. And heavy CAN be cute...I've SEEN it......I just don't know how to DO it.

I'm sorry for dumping a plethora of style issues on you, but I just don't know what to do......try for cute and the risks involved, or stick with what I know, and what has been working and be judged by Others?

I'm looking forward to the evening....the fam is on their OWN for dinner (leftovers) and I'm reading, watching Big Brother, and drinking the rest of a bottle of cheap, but tasty sparkling wine from a Missouri winery. It's 80 degrees, sunny, the windows are open (ACHOOOO) and life is good.

Oh, did I commit a social sin? I have fretted about this for the last 24 hours. While at a track meet last evening, I was sitting with 2 other mothers that I know, but not well. One of them lives in my town, but works in another community 30 miles away. I began making plans with one mother to possibly car-pool to another track meet on Wednesday. I took her number and we chatted about who likes to drive and who doesn't and why. I neglected to INCLUDE the third mother in the car-pool plans....because MY mind was telling me she'd probably leave from work in the other town....I wasn't trying to be RUDE, but HOW often have I been on the 'outside' wishing others would include me in their plans? How do I make amends? Do I just pretend I didn't realize I may have been RUDE and INSENSITIVE? Oh my....this worries me.

Alright, Internet, I'm looking for advice from the wise...HEELLPPPP!!!!

Insecurity (now with updates!)

I’ve been dealing with a highly emotional 14 yr old son and his girlfriend. Oy. Parenting is such a fly by the seat of your pants undertaking! No amount of planning, worrying, or reading can train you to deal with SITUATIONS. Now, mind you, I’m not claiming that this is as bad as it can be…..I KNOW there are many people dealing with major issues with their teens, and as grateful as I am to not be dealing with them (at least not for the moment), it’s still exhausting. I guess since the world hasn’t realized, yet, that it’s all about ME….I’ll have to succumb to the needs of others.

My poor baby was reduced to TEARS yesterday because I wouldn’t let him go to St. Louis with his girlfriend and her family. He’s very aggressive when trying to beg or argue his point, and he WOULD not stop hounding me—It all ended up with text messages from the girlfriend, professing her ‘LOVE’ for son #2, and did I MIND that she was ‘in love’ with my son………and did I think her outfit was ‘CUTE’ Saturday night….and she sure hoped we ‘luv’d’ her----

There was no real reason he couldn’t go with them to St. Louis—except he’d been with her from 9 am to 10 pm on Saturday---her parents took them out to eat, and to the mall---and really, does a 14 yr old need to be with their significant ‘other’ THAT much? Even with parental supervision? He needed to mow Perfectly’s Dad’s large yard and do some things that kids DO…….like detach themselves from a permanent lip lock……….sheesh. Nobody prepared me for the EMOTIONAL stuff that boys have…everyone complains about girls and how emotional they are, and I’m sure it’s a different sort of thing, but BOTH of my boys are highly emotional---my Oldest is just surly and won’t talk (unless he want’s something, then he’s a wealth of information—all sweetness and nice)…my youngest has a FIERY temper----he’s very even keel and easy going unless he doesn’t get something he wants, and then all HELL breaks loose. Luckily for us, his temper goes away as quickly as it came on.

THEN, yesterday, I colored my hair. I’m 42 and the grays are THICK..and, well, GRAY. I hate them. I got my hair cut (in the same fashion I ALWAYS DO), and went to wal-mart to find me some home hair color! I went with the $13.94 box instead of the $8.97 one because this had 2 steps….a color then HIGHLIGHTS. I went with the usual dark blond color—this one called BISCOTTI—and let me tell you---it’s brown. That mousy light brown. Now, mind you, I got the cheapo hair color last time, and after 10 days or so, it faded and turned really LIGHT…..so I went from blond (not platininum—but blond nonetheless) to light brown. It’s quite different. I like it, sort of…..I prefer it a little lighter, though. Somewhere between the brassy-ish blond and what it is now. My niece, Heather, came to help with the highlights….and it did lighten it some around the crown and on top, but overall it didn’t do much—probably because I chickened out and rinsed it a couple of minutes early---I didn’t want STRIPES or anything….so, now of course, I’ll be subjected to “oh….you did something different with your HAIR’ remarks all day—I HATE that. I don’t like to call attention to myself (unless it’s something really important or cool), and nothing sets off the office like something NEW to check out. I must say, with my cheap (ahem, free hand me down) purple shirt and the darker hair, my eyes seem to be bright today---the change between blue and green-ish—and even I notice them today…..maybe it’s my highlighted eyelashes? Do you think?

Happy Monday—more track meets this week---at least the weather is warmer, and I don’t have to take blankets to watch my kids run……

Oh, I spent the better part of yesterday (between hair coloring and food preparation) watching 'Deliver Me' on some cable channel in the 200's. I am not sure what was more interesting...the women having babies and their 'issues' or the doctor who is newly single, 38 and is having her ex husband (who's a doctor, too) freeze her eggs for future use should she feel the need.....wow..

Grill Season (Updated X 2)

It is supposed to be 63 here today---time for our first grilled meal of the year. In years past, Mr. Perfectly grilled in nearly ALL weather---but in recent history, we've gotten lazy. I've been on a soup and pasta kick, and those have been my 'go to' meals of late. We hardly grilled at all last year......I'm not sure why. We get our beef fresh from Perfectly's dad, who raises cows.....and we reap the benefits of a freezer full of lean, fresh, hormone/antibiotic free beef. But, believe it or not, I'm not a huge beef eater.....steak isn't my thought of a nice dinner out--I'll take seafood for that. But a juicy, TENDER steak is fine----steak sandwiches are great--but again TENDER is the key--I hate tough beef---ugh. He's low on beef, so we'll probably go with chicken today---I may buy a tri-tip steak to grill up very rare and put it up for sandwiches later--but one runs the risk of re-heating the steak too much and it's TOUGH. The goal would be to keep it pink, keep it hot, and tender--re-heating does not lend itself well to tender and pink....maybe I'll re-think the beef---I think he's totally out of hamburger---his burger is so good--and I don't like hamburger--it's lean and flavorful......he better hurry to get more!!

I'll be making a roasted vegetable cous cous for a side......I roast zucchini, tomatoes, onion, red/yellow peppers and mushrooms in a hot (450 or so) oven until they are roasty and cooked down....I make a box of cous cous with chicken broth instead of water---I add the roasted veg to the cous cous, and can you say FABULOUS??

What will YOU be doing on this pretty Saturday? Son #1 is working, and Son #2 is headed to his girlfriend's house--he'll go with her and her folks to her riding lesson and they'll hang out with her parents. I'll be cooking and cleaning, I am guessing........Happy Saturday Morning!!

UPDATE

New recipe from the Hy-Vee lady! I like to go to Hy Vee on the weekends just to see what she's got cooking.......she's different than the sample ladies---I mean she gives samples, and it is products I'm sure they want sold, BUT, she makes home-made dishes to sample--I don't know if they are her own creations, or if she has help, but so far, every one has been REALLY good (see Chicken Scallopini--that I now make weekly) This one is very easy and very little effort......

1 Pkg Hormel smoked center cut pork chops (very much like ham/canadian bacon)
1 yellow onion sliced
1 pkg button mushrooms sliced
garlic olive oil (or olive oil w/ garlic sauteed)

Brown the onions and mushrooms in garlic olive oil. Add the pre-cooked pork chops and saute just til hot. Serve.

HHEELLOOOOO?? Could that be any easier? Don't want pork? Buy a smoked chicken and use large meaty pieces instead of the pork. Don't want smoked? Use a regular boneless pork chop and brown it too........Cut up the pork and fork a mushroom and onion....mmmmm....that's what my sample was, and it was really good. And really easy. She even suggested to apply the same recipe at BREAKFAST and add eggs or pancakes. Now, since I'm not to big on breakfast, that didn't appeal to me as much, but for the breakfast lovers in the world, I can totally see how this would be awesome...for am breakfast, OR breakfast for dinner!

Enjoy! I can't wait each week to see what she has to offer! She always has wine samples too.....which is GREAT... I like my wine, but at 9:30 in the morning? That seems a little odd.....I mean maybe there are LOTS of people who start drinking wine at 9:30--who am I to judge? But it seems a LIIITTTLLLLEE early. Or at least too early to do it in PUBLIC!

Eat up--and thank the Hy-Vee lady!

Update....again...

Ok, in watching Food TV, one of the cooking shows had ROASTED VEG cous cous. I wish someone would give ME a show!!